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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Modern medical science has made it possible to combat many diseases. This is one reason that people are living longer lives now than they did in the past. Discuss the effects this might have on society.

#science #combat #diseases #reason #people #lives #effects #society
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In today's fast-paced world, an increase in the length of
life
 expectancy has become a real concern
among
Change preposition
in
show examples
society.
This
 essay will explore the reasons behind it
such
 as improved healthcare systems and some of the effects that can have an impact on
countries
such
 as
overpopulation
.
To begin
 with, one of the primary reasons is the sophisticated healthcare systems. Today, many diseases can be treated via cutting-edge technological tools compared to past times. In past days, there were limited numbers of healthcare facilities but today nearly in all cities, hospitals are built and
people
 can access them easily. Another underlying cause of
this
 phenomenon is the high quality of
life
 that many developed
countries
 have. They provide their citizens with wide-ranging opportunities that contribute to a better lifestyle. Turning to the effects of longer
life
 expectancies, a major problem is
overpopulation
. As
people
 live longer and new generations come,
countries
 suffer from
overpopulation
.
This
 issue contributes to the depletion of natural resources which is a growing concern for future generations. Another impact that
overpopulation
 gives rise to is the lack of space. As the number of
people
 rises, there will be a need to live in. Based on
this
 reasoning, many green spaces are knocked down and converted into residential areas. All in all, the extended
life
 expectancy of the
people
 has become a topic of debate.
This
 issue has its own causes
such
 as developments in medical science and high standards of living that the
countries
 offer.
Besides
 its causes, it has many devastating impacts on society
such
 as
overpopulation
 and shortage of natural resources.
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Support Examples
To enhance your score, consider providing specific examples to support each of your points. Real-world statistics, studies, or historical examples can significantly strengthen your argument.
Explanations
Work on developing your paragraphs with more detailed explanations. Elaborating on your points with more depth will not only clarify your ideas but also create a more engaging essay for the reader.
Vocabulary
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas. This not only demonstrates your language proficiency but also helps to make your arguments more compelling.
Structure
Your essay introduces the topic and concludes in a clear manner, providing a strong frame for your discussion.
Understanding
You've successfully identified and discussed significant impacts of increased life expectancy on society, which shows good understanding of the subject.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • geriatric medicine
  • chronic conditions
  • retirement age
  • pension payouts
  • caregiving roles
  • assisted living technologies
  • age-related research
  • cultural norms
  • ageism
  • intergenerational relationships
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