Robots and artificial intelligence are being developed to replace humans in the workplace. Why is this happening? Do you think this is a positive or a negative impact on society?
The development of virtual
intelligence
and machines is said to be taking over the human's
role in many tasks at the workplace Change noun form
human
as a result
of increased efficiency. Critics including me believe that this
is a negative phenomenon due to
the rise of global un employment
Correct your spelling
unemployment
level
.
It must be acknowledged that artificial Fix the agreement mistake
levels
intelliegence
(Correct your spelling
intelligence
A.I
) and Correct your spelling
AI
robotscan
produce more progress Correct your spelling
robots can
robots
that
humans. Correct word choice
than
This
is especially so when automation is applied globally. Consequently
, the income of factories and restaurants will be boosted as these robotic empolyees
demand no recess periods or salaries Correct your spelling
employees
besides
the cost of purchasing, maintainance
and electricity. Correct your spelling
maintenance
For example
, in many factories in Germany, as robots
are utilized as the main workforce, these factories' revenue increased up to 20 percent
, Change the spelling
per cent
according to
CNBC.
Another argument worth considering is that robots
and human-made intelligence
can replace most of the labour work and cognitive task
. Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
This
is because of the deliberation that they posess
. Correct your spelling
possess
Subsequently
, employers would prefer machines to be the main labour force to save resources from possible human errors and this
will lead to ever increasing
unemployment level, which is already an issue Correct your spelling
ever-increasing
to
Change preposition
in
this
ever changing
world. Add a hyphen
ever-changing
Furthermore
, the agreement to totally replace humans by
Change preposition
with
robots
and A.I
could result in riots and crimes. Correct pronoun usage
It
For instance
, according
VNexpress, Add the preposition
according to
Formorsa
Correct your spelling
Formosa
have
witnessed Change the verb form
has
striking
from high-level employees because they feel that human-made Replace the word
strikes
intelligence
might have a possibility of taking over their position.
In conclusion, the
increasing working progress, virtual Change preposition
with the
intelligence
and robots
could have taken over the human's position with the agreement of the authorities. However
, as that happened, objections will be applied with brutal force by unemployers
.Correct your spelling
employees
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grammar
Be mindful of typos and grammar mistakes, such as 'virtual intelligence and machines is said to be' which should be 'are said to be' and 'un employment' which should be 'unemployment'. These small errors can distract from the overall quality of your writing.
coherence
To further enhance coherence, ensure to maintain consistent and clear transitions between paragraphs. This will strengthen the logical flow of your arguments.
task response
For an even stronger task achievement, ensure that both sides of the argument (positive and negative impacts) are equally explored. Though you've adeptly discussed the negative impacts, adding more about potential positive impacts would create a more balanced view.
task response
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt, showing a clear understanding of the task at hand.
task response
You've provided relevant, specific examples to support your arguments, such as the factory example from Germany and the VNexpress example, which strengthen your argumentation.
coherence cohesion
The overall structure of your essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, demonstrates good coherence and cohesion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?