Government should spend money on railways rather than results.

#government #money #railways #results

Innthis

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In this

contemporary era some

segment

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segments

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of society assert that higher

authrity

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authority

ought to arrange

budget

railway

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railways

show examples

instead

of elections. In my

opinion

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opinion,

show examples

I agree with

this

notion. The reasons behind my agreement are

anyalised

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analysed

analyzed

in the subsequent paragraphs. To commence with,

government

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the government

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ought to spend money on

railway

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railways

show examples

because of poor transportation, To

explian

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explain

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

, many of the

countries

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country's

countries'

show examples

railway

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railways

show examples

are not good

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show examples

transportation

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for

show examples

an example train

not

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do not

show examples

come in

right

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the right

show examples

time, some times it is

delaied

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delayed

an hours

as well as

some routs are under construction

that is

why people are disapointed about it. If higher authority is spent their

budget

slove

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solve

show examples

railway related

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railway-related

show examples

problems,

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apply

show examples

people can save their time and

undirectly

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indirectly

show examples

notions'

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the

show examples

economy will be upsurged over the period of time.

For example

train

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a train

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in Japan is hardly

delaied

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delayed

for 5 seconds.

Therefore

budget

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the budget

a budget

show examples

should spend on

transportaion

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transportation

such

railway

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the railway

show examples

government

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the government

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Moreover

higher

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the higher

show examples

authority

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authorities

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have to spend some portion of

national

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the national

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budget

because of

develope

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developing

advanced

aminities

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amenities

for citizens. To elaborate

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apply

show examples

, in some

railway

station

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stations

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government

not

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does not

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provide some basic

requirenments

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requirements

such

as no waiting area and electricity problems ,but if

government

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the government

show examples

focus

to mitigate

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on mitigating

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this

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these

show examples

requirenments

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requirements

requirement

and

spend

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spending

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money on required

facitities

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facilities

such

as free wifi, air conditionar waiting areas and

maintain

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maintaining

show examples

hygine. So

travel

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the travel

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ratio will be increased in

nation

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the nation

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and

also

people can motivated to travel with the use of public

transportion

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transport

rather than using

private

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a private

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vehicle

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vehicles

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, it

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is also used

show examples

also

use to save

ecology

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ecologies

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such

stop

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a stop

show examples

to prevent global warming and air pollution.

Thus

, it is

requirement

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a requirement

the requirement

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

higher authority

spend

Fix the infinitive

to spend

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money on

railway

Add an article

the railway

show examples

To conclude

, some

pople

Correct your spelling

people

think that

government

spend their

budget

Correct article usage

the railway

show examples

railway

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railways

show examples

rather than

Correct article usage

the elections'

show examples

elections'

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elections

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result

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results

show examples

because of

fulfil

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fulfilling

show examples

the

requirenment

Correct your spelling

requirement

requirements

Change preposition

for

show examples

poor

transfortation

Correct your spelling

transportation

transformation

and

improve

Wrong verb form

improving

show examples

facilities.

Submitted by jankibrahmbhatt2411 on Mon Apr 01 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure

Attempt to structure your paragraphs more clearly. Start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence, followed by explanations, examples, and a concluding sentence.

Grammar

Work on proofreading your essay to catch and correct grammatical errors and typos. This will help in improving the overall clarity and professionalism of your writing.

Language Use

Use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to demonstrate your language proficiency. This includes mixing simple, compound, and complex sentences, as well as using synonyms effectively.

Relevance

Ensure that your essay stays on topic by clearly addressing the prompt. Refrain from straying into tangents that are not directly relevant to the question at hand.

Coherence

Improve the coherence of your essay by using transition words and phrases effectively. This will help in smoothly guiding the reader from one idea to the next, creating a more cohesive and compelling argument.

Stance

You presented a clear stance on the topic, which is a good practice for task achievement.

Examples

You provided specific examples to support your points, such as the example of train punctuality in Japan. This is effective in substantiating your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
67Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

294 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Government should spend money on railways rather than results.

Your opinion

The average age for individuals to give birth is increasing. Some people think that it will have negative impact on family and country. What is your opinion about this?

Many Offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishments. Why is this happening and what measures can be taken to tackle these problems

Overweight Children In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government should be responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that developed countries have a higher responsibility to combat climate change than developing countries. Others believe that all countries should have the same responsibilities towards protecting the environment. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?