Around the world, rural people are moving to cities and urban areas, so populations in the countryside are decreasing. Is this a positive or negative development?

In recent years increasing number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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rural residents have decided to leave their living places and farms to join the people in big
cities
.
This
decision has brought a
especial
Correct your spelling
special
show examples
concern regarding a prompt decline in the population of the rural
areas
. From my personal point of view,
this
issue has more negative impacts than positive results, both for the
villages
and the
cities
. I would like to start off my discussion by writing about why the country people decide to migrate to the
cities
. First of all, there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
less variety of jobs in
villages
and
Correct article usage
the work-forces
show examples
work-forces
Correct your spelling
workforce
show examples
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
to be really hard working and strong to be able to deal with agriculture and other related jobs.
Secondly
, for that amount of
work-load
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work-load,
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the workers get
paied
Correct your spelling
paid
less compared with the similar working hours in the
cities
.
Therefore
, more and more rural people get settled in the
cities
everyday
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every day
show examples
.
In addition
, another significant factor is the better living facilities in most aspects of life in
cities
such
as a better transportation system and
definietly
Correct your spelling
definitely
a more advanced educational system.
On the other hand
,
this
issue
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
some detrimental impacts on
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both
cities
and urban
areas
. One of the most important disadvantages is that in the long-term there will be less work-forces in the rural
areas
so the economy of the
villages
and the farming industry will be damaged.
For instance
, the production of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fresh fruits, vegetables and other farming products will be reduced and
as a
result
Add a comma
result,
show examples
the prices of those will
raise
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rise
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dramatically.
Moreover
, the population in the
cities
will increase significantly and
this
over population
Correct your spelling
overpopulation
show examples
will in turn put more pressure on the resources
due to
the evergrowing demands.
Accordingly
, governments must take some measures to prevent
this
. To summarize, nowadays, an increasing number of rural residents migrate to the
cities
due to
the lack of facilities in the
villages
and the better opportunities in the
cities
. But,
this
is damaging for
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both
cities
and urban
areas
. So, to avoid
this
, governments ought to seek some solutions.
Submitted by bryan.dasco on

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Task Achievement
While your essay presents a clear argument, including more diverse and specific examples to support your points would enhance the depth and persuasiveness of your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay would benefit from a more varied use of linking phrases and cohesive devices to improve the flow between ideas and paragraphs.
Task Achievement
To further enhance your essay, consider developing your ideas more thoroughly. Expanding on how the issues you mention directly impact rural and urban areas would add depth to your analysis.
Task Achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt, providing a clear opinion on the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay is logically structured, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which makes it easy to follow.
Task Achievement
You have successfully highlighted both the reasons for migration and its impacts, showing a good understanding of the issue at hand.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Urbanization
  • Amenities
  • Economic prospects
  • Overcrowding
  • Traffic congestion
  • Pollution
  • Agricultural abandonment
  • Cultural diversity
  • Innovation
  • Cultural heritage
  • Family ties
  • Infrastructure
  • Public services
  • Sustainable urban planning
  • Rural revitalization
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