The bar chart below shows the average Australian water consumption in selected cities for last year. The pie chart shows the distribution of Australian water consumption for last year.

The bar chart below shows the average Australian water consumption in selected cities for last year. The pie chart shows the distribution of Australian water consumption for last year.
The given bar chart represents the average consumption of
water
in six selected cities of Australia during the
last
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
previous year, and the supplied pie chart states the proportion of each destination of Australian
water
distribution for the
last
year
similarly
.
Overall
, it is
obviousely
Correct your spelling
obviously
detectable that Perth was the highest
water
consumer city,
while
Canberra was the lowest one among selected areas. Agricultural activities were the most places which have used
water
and mining
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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consumed the least amount of
water
in Australia. Focusing on details reveals that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Perth's residents use roughly 300 Kiloliter of
water
annually per each property, and Conberrians by less than 150
Killoliter
Correct your spelling
Kiloliter
per building in one year was the less
water
consumer. Brisbane, Adelaide, Sydney, and Melbourne with 250, nearly 240, 200, and slightly less than 150
kiloliter
Change to a plural noun
kiloliters
show examples
per property were in the next places for
anuulaly
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annual
water
usage, respectively. Diving
in
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into
show examples
more
details
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detail
show examples
shows that 2% of whole distributed
water
in Australia was used for mining which
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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recieved
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received
the lowest proportion. Agricultural usage had 67 per cent shares of total
water
in
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apply
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among all Austrailian
sectores
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sectors
.
Household
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Households
show examples
stand
at
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in
show examples
third place to
recieve
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receive
water
shares, with 9%.
Fourtheen
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Four
per cent of
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
amonut
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amount
of
water
was sent to
Water
Correct article usage
the Water
show examples
and wastewater
managment
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management
sections
along with
power
supliers
Correct your spelling
suppliers
supplies
. And a summation of distributed
water
to manufacturing and other industries was 8%.
Submitted by enayatollahi.at on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 82%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words water with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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