Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The disappearance of various types of plants and
animals
seem
Correct subject-verb agreement
seems
show examples
to be the most urgent environmental
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
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of
Change preposition
in
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our society.
While
some people believe that many other environmental
problems
are in an emergency to
due
Correct your spelling
do
show examples
with.My stance is that biodiversity imbalance is not the most difficult problem of the world and the more important
problems
such
as air pollution
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
an immediate provision. Admittedly, there is evidence suggesting how
harm
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harmful
show examples
Correct article usage
the disappearing
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disappearing
Replace the word
disappearance
show examples
of several plants and
animals
is
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are
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doing to the
environment
.
This
can be seen in the extinction of natural habitats and many animal species
due to
deforestation and poaching, resulting in the disruption of the balance of nature and destabilization of ecosystems.
Such
problems
,
however
, are caused by maladroit governments that either overlook the importance of the
environment
or the repercussions of their inaction because of a thriving economy.
Thus
, the
environment
could still be protected if
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
posed more
strictly
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strict
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regulations
such
as hefty fines, sentenced individuals who break the laws to
jails
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jail
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and encouraged organizations and citizens to raise
fund
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funds
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open
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to open
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zoo
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zoos
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to preserve rare
animals
or plant more trees. I am convinced that air pollution in cities is the most urgent threat all over the world. It might be caused by vehicle
emission
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emissions
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and industrial activities.
For example
, traffic congestion and the burning of fossil fuels in vehicles release pollutants
such
as carbon monoxide into the atmosphere.
In addition
, the process of manufacture and the activity of industry emit pollutants
such
as sulfur dioxide and nitrogen oxides. These pollutants can,
hence
, harm the degradation of the
environment
,causing climate
changes
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change
show examples
.
This
is particularly true in the case of
our
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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today’s earth where we suffer from various tremendous disasters
such
as
flood
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floods
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,
tsunami
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tsunamis
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,
earthquake
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earthquakes
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and
drought
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droughts
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due to
climate changes, directly affecting human life.These
problems
are way far earnest
cause
Correct word choice
because
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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governments can not
forbidden
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forbid
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people
to
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from
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transporting
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transport
show examples
and halt manufacturing activities cause it will negatively affect the development of the world economy. In conclusion, I believe that the urgency of solving the loss of
animals
and plants
to
Add a missing verb
is to
show examples
protect the world’s biodiversity,
however
, air pollution is more necessary for governments to tackle and to find solutions since it affects human life.
Submitted by nttung.182 on

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task achievement
Provide a clear thesis statement in your introduction to directly address the essay prompt. This helps to clarify your position from the beginning.
coherence cohesion
Use paragraphs effectively to separate your ideas. Each paragraph should deal with a single main idea, supported by examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures to improve readability and coherence. Using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences can make your essay more dynamic.
coherence cohesion
Improve clarity by being more concise in your explanations. Avoid overly complex sentences and ensure that your ideas are clearly expressed.
task achievement
Ensure the relevance of your examples by tying them directly back to the main argument. Each example should clearly support your viewpoint.
general
Carefully proofread your essay for grammatical and spelling errors. While a few minor errors are acceptable, make sure they do not hinder the understanding of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Use transitional phrases to link your ideas between paragraphs and sentences. This enhances the flow of your essay and helps in maintaining coherence.
task achievement
You have effectively addressed both views of the argument before stating your own opinion, showcasing a good understanding of the task.
task achievement
The conclusion successfully summarizes your argument and reiterates your opinion, which is key for strong task achievement.
task achievement
Your essay contains relevant examples that support your arguments, adding depth to your discussion.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
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