IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#tourists #caribbean #island #information #features #comparisons
this
 line graph depicts
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
 in millions visiting a specific
carribean
Correct your spelling
caribbean
 island in
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 between 2010
ane
Correct your spelling
and
show examples
 2017. It is clear from the graph that the
Correct your spelling
number
numbera
Correct your spelling
number
 of
visitors
 in
increase
Replace the word
increased
show examples
, beginning from 1 at least and going up to 1.5 and more in
period
Add an article
a period
the period
show examples
 of 7 years.
According to
 what is shown in spite of
Visitors
 staying on
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
fluctuated
Replace the word
fluctuating
show examples
,
visitors
 staying on cruise ships chart
as well as
Total
Correct article usage
the Total
show examples
 chart were similar to each other,
however
 as
Total
Correct article usage
the Total
show examples
 rose
start
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
 from 1 and continued dramatically soar in
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
 between 2012 and 2014, until
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 3.5 million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
visitors
,
on the other
hand
Add the comma(s)
hand,
show examples
Visitors
 staying on
island
Correct article usage
the island
show examples
 rate was like
wave
Add an article
a wave
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
gradually
rose
Wrong verb form
rising
show examples
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 2011 to 2016,
slightly
Correct word choice
and slightly
show examples
declined
Wrong verb form
declining
show examples
 in 2016.
To sum up
 I should analyse the
last
 one which is, ta
visitors
 staying on cruise ships ,
Rephrase
There hug
show examples
hug
Correct your spelling
huge
show examples
 change between 2013 and 2017
that is
 was after a
slowly decreased
Replace the word
slow decrease
show examples
 in 2012 , to reach 2 million in the end.
Submitted by reem2006303 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: