why do most young people are likely to use the internet?

Nowadays, there are many
people
from all over the world
use
Correct pronoun usage
who use
show examples
the
Internet
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
might become our hobby. We need the
Internet
for different purposes in our life
such
as studying, working or relaxing.In my opinion, using the
Internet
might bring more positive than negative.
Firstly
most students including me usually use the
Internet
to search
information
Change preposition
for information
show examples
helpful for my homework.I do that every day because if I don't have homework I have other things that need the
Internet
for example
relaxing.These
day
Fix the agreement mistake
days
show examples
people
don't need to buy newspapers
becauce
Correct your spelling
because
they are all on the
Internet
this
means we can save a lot of paper and trees and
also
convinient
Correct your spelling
convenient
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
finding news.In
this
4.0 era, to keep up with the modern
fast -paced
Correct your spelling
fast-paced
show examples
life, most young
people
need to follow and keep up all the time if they don't want to be left behind in
this
new world.In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
I think young
people
need to learn more about technology to make their better future.
Submitted by nguyenhoanghadl on

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Complexity of Language
Consider using a wider range of sentence structures to enhance the complexity of your writing.
Paragraph Structure
Try to organize your paragraphs more effectively by having clear topic sentences and supporting details.
Supporting Examples
Include more specific examples to support your points; this makes your arguments more convincing.
Grammar
Review the proper usage of articles ('a', 'an', 'the') and other basic grammatical structures to improve clarity.
Spelling & Typos
Examine your essay for typographical and spelling errors to ensure it is polished and professional.
Opinion Consistency
You clearly state your opinion and maintain a consistent stance throughout the essay, which is important in IELTS writing.
Structure
You've effectively used the introduction and conclusion sections, which helps structure your essay and presents a rounded argument.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • E-commerce
  • Consumer behavior
  • Virtual marketplace
  • Cybersecurity
  • Digital footprint
  • Return policy
  • Comparison shopping
  • Customer reviews
  • Retail therapy
  • Logistics
  • User interface
  • Payment gateway
What to do next:
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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