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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below gives information about international tourist arrivals in five countries. USA,France, malaysia, Brazil and Egypt

The graph below gives information about international tourist arrivals in five countries. USA,France, malaysia, Brazil and Egypt
#information #tourist #arrivals #five #countries #usa #france #malaysia #brazil #egypt
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The graph provides data about the visitors who visited five countries from different countries between 1995 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,
most
Correct word choice
the highest
show examples
 number of people travelled USA throughout the time frame,
while
Linking Words
 the lowest number of travelers
from
Add a missing verb
were from
show examples
 Egypt. France
shown
Add the auxiliary verb
showed
has shown
show examples
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 fluctuation over the period of time.
At
Change the preposition
In
show examples
 the beginning, the number of people
selected
Correct pronoun usage
who selected
show examples
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 as a travel destination was almost 70
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
, which
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased by almost 10
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 in 2010. Around 30
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 travelers
choose
Wrong verb form
chose
show examples
 France in 1995.
This
Linking Words
 amount
raised
Verb problem
increased
show examples
 drastically and
became
Verb problem
apply
show examples
double
Replace the word
doubled
show examples
 in 2000 & almost three times from the starting point in 2010. In 1995, just less than 10
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 visitors picked Brazil and Egypt in 1995, which increased slightly and reached close to 20
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 for both the countries.
However
Linking Words
, Malaysia was fixed by 20
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 and 40
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 in 1995 and 2010 respectively.
Submitted by mokaddamul on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words millions with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • International tourist arrivals
  • Trends
  • Highlighting
  • Analysing
  • Potential factors
  • Growth patterns
  • Declines
  • Driving those changes
  • Influenced
  • External factors
  • Global economic conditions
  • Health crises
  • Government policies
  • Visa regulations
  • Tourism promotion efforts
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