IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Robots and artificial intelligence are being developed to replace humans in the workplace Why is this happening? Do you think this will have a positive and negative impact on society?

#robots #intelligence #humans #workplace #impact #society
The development in AI and
robots
fields
 are altering almost
work
Correct determiner usage
all work
show examples
 of
humans
 in most big companies. It is the writer of
this
 essay who contends that
this
 is an adverse influence in the near future
due to
 the significant changes in the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of jobless
people
 in all
fields
. One of the core reasons why
humans
 are highly replaced by
robots
 and artificial intelligence is that they demand a massive amount of production from the industry. In light of
this
, the productivity of
robots
 and AI is always much for than that of
humans
.
Moreover
, modern machines occupy the process of goods anytime under control and without their breaking down. Take a recent article by a number of German workplaces as an example where
people
 made workplaces without
humans
 in all
fields
, they chose to replace with the developed AI tool to production to produce more and more efficient products. They
also
 believed that the
robots
 could complete an abundance of demands from the customers in their country if the demand accounted for a massive amount. Another argument is that it is a negative development when AI and
robots
 work all day
instead
 of human activity. It can be seen that the percentage of unemployment around the world is higher when the
robots
 and artificial intelligence
fields
 are more developed. It is so challenging and difficult for
people
 to apply for modern companies because of their weaker than the machines.
Furthermore
, most individuals strongly believe that the risk of the industry is less
happen
Verb problem
apply
show examples
when
robots
 do
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
 lieu of
humans
.
According to
 the latest news in America, there are a plethora of jobless
people
 who do not have enough money for their life
such
 as renting
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 house, demanding food and drinking, . . . because their company is improved by a large number of
robots
 and automatic machines to produce and join in the process of their workplace anytime. They
also
 hope to find a job notwithstanding their low pay. By the
reason
Add a comma
reason,
show examples
 they think the AI engine system is a pressing issue around the world when there is an increasing trend of unemployment. Taking all points into account, there are some negative elements that are beneficial as the development of
robots
 and artificial intelligence may be altered completely and have a significant impact on the ability to work in the industry of
humans
 in the near future.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction and Conclusion
Try to include a brief introduction stating what the essay will cover and a concise conclusion summarizing your viewpoints to strengthen the overall structure.
Clear and Comprehensive Ideas
Enhance the clarity of your main ideas by stating them explicitly and supporting them with a wider range of examples or evidence.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make use of paragraphing to structure your essay more effectively, and work on linking words or phrases to ensure smoother transitions between ideas for better cohesion.
Use of Examples
Incorporate more specific examples or statistics to support your arguments and make them more convincing; this adds depth to your essay.
Task Response
You have effectively addressed the main task, discussing the reasons behind the increase in the use of robots and AI and considering their impact on society.
Argument Development
The essay demonstrates a good attempt at developing arguments and supporting them, showing an understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Automation
  • Efficiency
  • Cost-effective
  • Innovation
  • Technological advancements
  • Job displacement
  • Economic disparity
  • Dependency
  • Cyber-attacks
  • Ethical concerns
  • Moral questions
  • Standard of living
  • Income gap
  • Widespread automation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: