In some countries, birth rates are falling and experts say that by 2050 these countries will have far more adults aged 65 and over than children under 15. What problem might this cause in the future? Can anything be done to solve this issue?

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Birth
rates are falling down in some countries and experts forecast that in 2050 aged people far more than
children
under 15.
This
essay
firstly
Change the word
first
show examples
say
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says
show examples
that
population
fall
will
Verb problem
apply
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might be a
problem
in
future
and
then
state
Correct subject-verb agreement
states
show examples
that
population
growth
is the probable
solution
. In the beginning,
population
fall might
be show
Change the verb form
be shown
show examples
as a
problem
in
future
. If the
population
growth
stop
Correct subject-verb agreement
stops
show examples
, the
future
will scarry. It will impact the
population
, in
future
the
population
growth
may decrease dramatically, lack of young generation may be
there
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are shortage of willpower and
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
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.
Besides
, the work field or job sector falling the shortage of working power and
Wrong verb form
hiring
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hire
Wrong verb form
hiring
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
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worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
show examples
from other countries which
give
Verb problem
apply
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impact
Correct subject-verb agreement
impacts
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on
Correct article usage
the financial
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financial
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the financial
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sector as many
currency
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currencies
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goes out
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of
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from
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of
show examples
Correct article usage
the country
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country
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the country
show examples
.
For instance
: A survey
conduct
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conducted
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with
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by
show examples
Human
Correct article usage
the Human
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birth organization
Correct your spelling
Birth Organization
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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found that
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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of
population
growth
may
destroyed
Change the verb form
destroy
show examples
a nation in
future
. Uganda
cast
Verb problem
apply
show examples
and
it's
Correct your spelling
its
show examples
population
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
a great example for everyone.
However
,
population
growth
is the probable
solution
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
problem
.
Mother
Fix the agreement mistake
Mothers
show examples
encourage
Wrong verb form
are encouraged
show examples
to give
birth
children
Change preposition
to children
show examples
and
this
is the only
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
solution
. Nowadays
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
show examples
generation
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
interested
to give
Change preposition
in giving
show examples
birth
more
Change preposition
to more
show examples
children
than one but it is dangerous for
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
rate
. If everyone
should
Verb problem
is
show examples
encourage
Wrong verb form
encouraged
show examples
to give
birth
more
Change preposition
to more
show examples
children
the
rate
increase gradually and may
fill-up
Correct your spelling
fill up
show examples
the
desire
Replace the word
desired
show examples
rate
in
future
. In conclusion,
while
the
population
rate
face
Change the verb form
faces
show examples
the
problem
Change preposition
of as
show examples
as
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
decreased
population
rate
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the primary
solution
is
that
Change preposition
to
show examples
giving
Wrong verb form
give
show examples
birth
more
Change preposition
to more
show examples
children
than one
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
help to
over come
Correct your spelling
overcome
show examples
the
problem
.
Submitted by tanakchakma55 on

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Paragraph Focus
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Linking Phrases
Utilize a range of linking phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
Use of Examples
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Language Accuracy
Work on sentence structures and vocabulary to express your ideas more clearly and accurately.
Direct Task Response
You have tackled the topic directly and provided a response to both parts of the question.
Content Understanding
You've effectively indicated an understanding of the problems and solutions associated with declining birth rates.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Demographic shifts
  • Dependent population
  • Population pyramid
  • Healthcare provision
  • Pension schemes
  • Labor force
  • Economic sustainability
  • Generational equity
  • Immigration policies
  • Fertility incentives
  • Retirement reforms
  • Life expectancy
  • Workforce participation
  • Social security
  • Aging population
  • Birth rates
  • Technological innovation
  • Automated workforce
What to do next:
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