It is no longer necessary to use animals for food, clothing or medical research. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Its
Correct pronoun usage
It
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says that
its
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it's
it is
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not longer will
be use
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be used
be using
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livestok
Correct your spelling
livestock
for making food, creating clothes and dresses, and for medical reasons. I think
its
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it's
it is
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hard to completely agree with
this
Linking Words
studies
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study
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. In our daily life, we
are using
Wrong verb form
use
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animals
frequency
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frequently
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,
its
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it's
it is
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part of our life
in
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on
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this
Linking Words
planet,
from
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apply
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them
could
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can
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take
meats
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meat
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,
Correct word choice
and milks
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milks
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milk
kinds of milk
bowls of milk
pints of milk
glasses of milk
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, for eating, without that,
also
Linking Words
can
Verb problem
apply
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use it
in
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for
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medeical
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medical
issues,
as
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apply
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like
a
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apply
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medicene
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medicine
, medical drugs, and for sure medical experiments. As you
knows
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know
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not only clothing
coming
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comes
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from
defferent
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different
type
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types
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from
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of
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animals, but many accessories
for example
Linking Words
bags, walets,
belts
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and belts
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. Recently
useing
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using
see
matine
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marine
animals for perfumes, they discovered amber from whales.  In my opinion, life
its
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is
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relative
with
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to
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who is living with people.
Submitted by s0s01 on

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structure
Try to develop a clearer structure in your essay with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion to enhance readability and flow.
examples
Support your main points with more detailed examples or explanations to strengthen your argument.
clarity
Work on the clarity of your ideas by organizing them more logically and using transitions between them.
task response
Ensure your essay addresses the prompt directly by stating your position more clearly and developing your arguments in relation to the prompt.
engagement
You've provided a variety of points related to the use of animals which shows engagement with the topic.
comprehensiveness
Your willingness to cover multiple aspects of the issue (food, clothing, medicine) shows an attempt to provide a comprehensive view.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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