Your friends recently moved to a new city. You will also be moving to the same city. Write a letter to your friends and include: - Ask where to find a place to live - Tell them what type of place you’re looking for - Share some fun things you would like to do when you get there Write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses.

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Hi Jasmine, How are you doing? I hope you are doing well. I have some exciting news for you. I got admitted for my post-graduate studies at the UNSW and I will be moving to Australia by June. I hope to see you more. Anyway, I need your help to find a place to live. I am looking for a place to stay near my University or someplace that has a hassle-free commute . Could you please send me any trusted websites or let me know if you know of any affordable student accommodation?

Furthermore

Linking Words

, I am looking for a studio apartment below 400A$. The lesser the rent the better but safety is my first priority.

Besides

Linking Words

, I will be working part-time jobs where

subsequently

Linking Words

earn some money for myself.

Therefore

Linking Words

eventually I will be able to pay more rent. Admittedly you are the reason I am moving to Australia to do all the fun stuff together in our free time. In fact,

firstly

Linking Words

I want to visit the Luna Park. And

then

Linking Words

we can go to the Sydney Opera House.

Moreover

Linking Words

, let us go on a ferry ride around the harbour bridge.

To sum up

Linking Words

, please help me find a place and we will visit, well... everywhere. I miss you and I can't wait to meet you. Please ring me up if you have any information regarding the accommodation and list all the places we can visit. Hoping to hear from you soon. Warm Regards, Barbara.

dhayaneyvijayanFri Apr 05 2024

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What works well

greeting and closing

Your letter displays a clear and appropriate structure, with a suitable greeting, body, and closing.

complete response

The task was fully achieved, with all parts of the question addressed thoroughly.

suitable writing tone

You used a friendly and appropriate tone, making the letter engaging and personal.

Improvement Suggestions

coherence cohesion

Try to maintain a consistent thread of topic within each paragraph to enhance clarity and coherence.

task achievement

While your enthusiasm is clear, ensuring that each paragraph focuses more distinctly on one aspect can help with readability.

logical structure

For even better structure, consider briefly summarizing your request and excitement about moving in the concluding lines.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

Dear + name
Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

247 words

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What works well

Improvement Suggestions

The Greeting

Smoking not only harms the smoker, but also those who are nearby. Therefore, smoking should be banned in public places. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that it is better to promote healthy lifestyles and a health diet than spend so much money to treat obese people.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Your next door owns a small dog that barks throughout the day and the night write a letter to your neighbor requesting that something be done about the dog

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the adv of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadv? Give reasons for your answer & include relevant examples.

Today, many people do not know their neighbors in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?