Some people think that excessive use of smartphones badly affects a teenager’s literacy skills. Do you agree or disagree?
In contemporary society,
it
has been a long debate about Correct pronoun usage
there
smartphone
addiction
impact Change noun form
addiction's
to
youngsters, Change preposition
on
whether
phone usage Correct word choice
and whether
give
Change the verb form
gives
advantage
or detrimental Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
result
. Some societies have Fix the agreement mistake
results
notion
that Add an article
the notion
a notion
overuse
Correct article usage
the overuse
Change preposition
of gadget
gadget
could impact teenager awareness performance, Fix the agreement mistake
gadgets
while
I do not agree with this
opinion wholeheartedly. In forthcoming paragraphs, I will ellaborate
Correct your spelling
elaborate
the
positive and negative Change preposition
on the
effect
of Fix the agreement mistake
effects
smarphone
and provide logical Correct your spelling
smartphone
smartphones
solution
to filter the harmful Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
effect
of overly Fix the agreement mistake
effects
use
Wrong verb form
used
gadget
.
First and foremost, Communication devices Fix the agreement mistake
gadgets
is
Change the verb form
are
ubiquitos
rightnow since it become a primary need for everyone and adolescents Correct your spelling
ubiquitous
is
no Correct subject-verb agreement
are
exeption
. By using Correct your spelling
exception
Add an article
a smartphone
smartphone
, we can connect to the world, Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
for
instance
we can read Add a comma
instance,
news
Correct article usage
the news
easyly
, watch a podcast, and catch up with the Correct your spelling
easily
communites
in Correct your spelling
communities
single
touch. If we can Add an article
a single
use
smartphone
properly, Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
it
can become Correct pronoun usage
they
perfect
Correct article usage
the perfect
appliance
Fix the agreement mistake
appliances
to learn
and improve our knowledge Change preposition
for learning
significanly
.
Correct your spelling
significantly
On the other hand
, a lot of kids today witnessing
excessive Wrong verb form
witness
use
of phones to access non-important website
. To exemplify, They tend to spend their time Fix the agreement mistake
websites
by
scrolling on Change preposition
apply
instagram
or playing Change the capitalization
Instagram
game
all day. Fix the agreement mistake
games
By owing
to these reasons, children do not have time anymore to learn or Verb problem
Due
reading
a book which badly Wrong verb form
read
influenced
their literation performance. On top of that,The majority Wrong verb form
influences
youngsters
who became Change preposition
of youngsters
a phone dependence
never connect with communities again which Correct your spelling
phone-dependent
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
they
have a low awareness Correct pronoun usage
them
to
the environment.
Change preposition
of
To sum up
, Mobile devices have both advantegeos
effects Correct your spelling
advantageous
advantages
as well as
harmful impacts based on the way we use
it
. As a guardian, parents should teach their Correct pronoun usage
them
child
how to Fix the agreement mistake
children
use
smartphone
Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
in
the right path, Change preposition
on
such
as implement
child mode. In the future, I hope proper mobile phone utilization Change preposition
by implementing
lesson
should be Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
teached
in every school to guide the students.Correct your spelling
taught
Submitted by epindonta02 on
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task achievement
Your essay contains relevant points about the impact of smartphones on teenagers, which is good. However, try to ensure you have a clear position throughout your essay to enhance your argument.
coherence and cohesion
To further improve clarity and cohesion, consider using a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing more effectively to clearly separate your ideas and arguments.
task achievement
Including more specific examples or data to support your arguments can strengthen your essay. This approach can provide a stronger foundation for your opinions.
task achievement
You have provided a balanced perspective by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of smartphone usage, which is excellent for the task.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present and wrap up your essay effectively, contributing to a good structure.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.