Earlier technological developments brought more benefits and changed the life of ordinary people more than recent developments ever will. To what extent do you agree of disagree?

#developments #life #people

There is an ongoing debate regarding which

techology

Correct your spelling

technology

is best. A majority of people believe that the technological

developments

which had happened in the past had changed the

life

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lives

show examples

of common individuals and had numerous merits compared to recent

developments

and the new technology will be inferior to the past 's.

However

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However,

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I completely oppose

this

view and my stance is discussed in the following paragraphs.

Correct pronoun usage

There

show examples

is no doubt that old technological

development

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developments

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are good, but they are just dust compared to

development

Add an article

the development

show examples

of the modern era.

To begin

with, in the

millieum

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milieu

of years ago

human

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humans

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first invented wheels

accidently

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accidentally

and after

that vehicles

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that vehicle

those vehicles

show examples

like cars,

bike

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bikes

show examples

and so on were invented which

runs

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run

show examples

on fuels like petrol and diesel which causes pollution.

However

, nowadays vehicles are running on CNG gas and electric

car

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cars

show examples

and

motorcycle

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motorcycles

show examples

are

also

invented.

Thes

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They

show examples

reduce the amount of pollution which is highly beneficial to all living

beigns

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beings

Furthermore

, gadgets

such

telephone

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the telephone

show examples

was

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were

show examples

firstly

Change the word

first

show examples

invented in

17th

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the 17th

show examples

century and it is used for communicating with

other

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others

show examples

. But , in

21st

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the 21st

show examples

century Folks are

owing

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owning

show examples

smartphones rather

that

Correct word choice

than

show examples

telephone

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telephones

show examples

due to

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

numerous advantages.

As a result

, smartphones are the best and useful gadgets of the modern period Apart from these, various digital facilities are available

such

as modern infrastructure, electricity and much more

due to

the solution of technology which is not possible in

oldera

Correct your spelling

older

older a

this

way, nowadays there is nobody who can live with latest gadgets as every person need it everyday.

Therefore

, the latest invention has made human

life

easy.

To sum up

old

Correct article usage

the old

show examples

era's

developments

and inventions have made

folks

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folks'

folk's

show examples

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

straightforward in the past,

however

comparing it to the modern period is like comparing the knowledge of an infant and an expert. Recent

developments

such

as electricity, smartphones and so on have made people's

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

easygoing in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

modern

time

Fix the agreement mistake

times

show examples

and

also

have limitless benefits.

Submitted by akshayashvi07 on Sat Apr 06 2024

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Structure

Ensure that each paragraph presents one clear idea, supported by examples and explanations. Mixing multiple ideas can detract from the clarity of your argument.

Grammar

Review and correct grammatical errors and typos to enhance the overall readability of your essay.

Conclusion

Develop your conclusion more thoroughly. Summarize your main points and clearly state your opinion in relation to the prompt.

Vocabulary

Use a wide variety of vocabulary but ensure that word choice is accurate and appropriate for the context.

Accuracy

Ensure all invented examples or historical information are plausible and add value to your argument.

Introduction

You successfully introduced the topic and clearly stated your opinion, setting a strong foundation for your argument.

Content

You made effective comparisons between past and present technological developments, illustrating your points with relevant examples.

Structure

Your essay structure, with distinct paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion, helps in organizing the content and maintaining the flow of ideas.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
33Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

318 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Earlier technological developments brought more benefits and changed the life of ordinary people more than recent developments ever will. To what extent do you agree of disagree?

Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

In the past people liked to store knowledge in books. However, in the present, we prefer to store knowledge on the Internet. Do you think the advantages outweight the disadvantages?

1.Adults today do not do enough exercise. Some people believe that showing major sports events like the Olympics or the Football World Cup on television encourages people to exercise. Others argue that there are better ways to encourage adults to move more. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that dangerous sports such as boxing, or motor-racing should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

With all the problems in the world today, spending money on space exploration is a complete waste. The money could be better spent on other causes. To what extent do you agree with this view? Give reasons for your answer and give any relevant example or experience you have to support your answer.