IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#line #show #information #crime #uk #year #summarise #features #comparisons
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he
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The
show examples
 pie chart and line graph below
illustrates
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrate
show examples
 the different types of
crime
 committed in Britain and the correlation between
age
 and
crime
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 past year respectively.
Overall
, violent crimes are the most committed and the
age
 that
commits
Wrong verb form
committed
show examples
 the most
crime
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 past year was around 20
years
 old.
At slightly
Change preposition
Slightly
show examples
 less than half of the
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
 committed were violent
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
, followed closely
at
Change preposition
by
show examples
 close to a quarter of the
overall
crime
 were property and drug crimes. The
last
 type of
crime
that is
 being committed is
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
about one-tenth of the total crimes.
Next,
the correlation
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
between
age
 and
crime
 indicates a sharp rise from 12 to 16
years
 old of nearly 15 times before climbing to a peak at 80000 at the
age
 of 20. For the next 4
years
 onwards, there was a decline to 60000 and
finally
 to less than 20000 the next 40
years
.
Submitted by chubbybunny on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words crime, age, years with synonyms.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • The line graph depicts
  • The pie chart illustrates
  • reveals
  • displays
  • depicts
  • the trend of
  • the overall crime rate
  • steadily decreased
  • the distribution of
  • different types of crime
  • prevalent
  • accounts for
  • the most common crime
  • followed by
  • make up
  • a smaller proportion of
  • the total crimes
  • a smaller percentage
  • approximately
  • the remaining percentage
  • It is important to note that
  • reflects
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