Some people think that the government is responsible for looking after the elderly. Others believe that it should be family members. Who do you think should take responsibility?
In
this
modern era, people are running short of their time
and due to
that, they are not able to take care
of the elders
. On the other side, there are many elders
who don't have their families and are under the government
's supervision. I personally believe that taking care
of elders
should be a family's responsibility. Moving forward, this
essay will provide examples and a conclusion to support my view.
If we talk about care
, our parents and elders
used to take care
of us when we were children. They were also
facing similar issues related to time
management but they still managed to do it. In this
era, the story is opposite where family members don't have much time
to take care
of their elders
and as a result
, they send them to government
-funded old age homes. For example
, I had one
relative who was tired of taking care
of his mother and he decided to send his mother to government
-funded homes. What if our elders
did the same with us when we were children and sent us to the government
?
Furthermore
, the government
should definitely look after the elderly who don't have their immediate family members with them. There are many elders
who are alone and there is no one
to take care
of them, in that case, the government
is a perfect source of help. For example
, I had one
family friend who died in a road accident and there was no one
to take care
of his parents. His parents then
mutually decided to move to a government
-funded house where they could spend time
with other elderly and try to forget their child who is no more.
In conclusion, I firmly believe that the elders
who have their immediate family members alive should be taken care
of by their family. The rest of the elders
, who are totally alone should be taken care
of by the government
.Submitted by tirththakkar23 on
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task achievement
Try to elaborate your points further by adding more detailed examples or clearer explanations to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures to enhance the readability and sophistication of your writing.
grammar
Keep observing grammatical accuracy and punctuation as you did in this essay, but also focus on refining complex sentence structures where possible.
task achievement
The essay provided a balanced view by considering both the role of the family and the government in caring for the elderly. Your introduction and conclusion effectively framed your argument.
task achievement
You effectively used specific examples to support your points, which made your argument more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a good logical flow, making it easy for readers to follow your argument.