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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

the chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annual inc9ome in 2007, 2011, and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

the chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annual inc9ome in 2007, 2011, and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
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The bar chart illustrates how much money was earned in one year by the US people in the specific
years
Use synonyms
 which are 2007,2011 and 2015.
Overall
Linking Words
,less than $25,000 and more than $100,000 categories showed a fluctuating
trend
Use synonyms
 but other categories showed a steady
trend
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,25
million
Use synonyms
 people earned less than $25,000 in 2007.After four
years
Use synonyms
,the
trend
Use synonyms
 went high and reached almost 28
million
Use synonyms
 but within 4
years
Use synonyms
 the
number
Use synonyms
 slightly decreased to around 27
million
Use synonyms
. The $25,000-$49,999 category displayed more than 26
million
Use synonyms
 in 2007 but within the next 4
years
Use synonyms
number
Use synonyms
 touched 30
million
Use synonyms
 which is the highest
number
Use synonyms
 for
this
Linking Words
 category.
Finally
Linking Words
,in 2015
trend
Use synonyms
 line decreased to nearly 28
million
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,US people who had an income limit of around $50,000-$74,000 remained unchanged throughout the time frame.For less than $100,000 category
trend
Use synonyms
 line steadily changed within the timeline.
Lastly
Linking Words
,US individuals
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have the highest income,which is more than $100,000,for the
number
Use synonyms
 was nearly 30
million
Use synonyms
 in 2007 but in 2011
trend
Use synonyms
 fell and reached approximately 27
million
Use synonyms
.Next four
years
Use synonyms
,the graph reached its peak,which was almost 33
million
Use synonyms
.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words years, trend, million, number with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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