Teenagers face a lot of difficulties at home and at school. What are the causes for this? How Can parents provide solutions?

Undoubtedly, not only adults,
teenagers
Correct word choice
but teenagers
show examples
face a variety of
pressure
Fix the agreement mistake
pressures
show examples
and
obstcles
Correct your spelling
obstacles
form daily
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
lives
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
. Normally, the
reson
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reason
can be divided into two parts. One is the relationship with
classmates
and family, another is the competition at
school
and the expectation from
parents
. These issues will be elaborated on as follows.
First,
one
significent
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significant
reason that causes
teengers
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teenagers
feel
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to feel
show examples
stressed is the serious competition at
school
. To be more specific, the
comparing
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comparison
show examples
between
classmates
is much more
sever
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severe
show examples
than we think. At
school
, young
children
is
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are
show examples
required to get a higher score in class since a better score represents a higher-salary job and
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
life in the future. The pressure from
school
and
parents
give
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puts
show examples
a huge burden
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers. Another
difficulties
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difficulty
show examples
that students need to deal with is the relationship between friends and
parents
.
School
is a place
requires
Correct pronoun usage
that requires
show examples
a lot of teamwork and cooperation with
classmates
. It
gives
Verb problem
puts
show examples
pressure
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
young
children
,
expecially
Correct your spelling
especially
in the
teenager
Replace the word
teenage
show examples
age, in which take
friends
Change noun form
friends'
friend's
show examples
and
classmates
' comments seriously.
Parents
, as the first teacher of
child
Add an article
the child
show examples
, were expected to give some suggestions and solutions to
child
Add an article
the child
a child
show examples
. As for my perspectives, I agree with the idea based on the understanding of
child
Correct article usage
the child
show examples
and the role
modle
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model
parents
played. Normally,
parents
have more connections with kids since they were
borned
Correct your spelling
born
on the earth and that helps
parents
to know the
children
's personalities better.
Parents
can offer their opinions and solutions to help
children
accourding
Correct your spelling
according
to the differences between
children
. In conclusion, teenagers suffer a variety of difficulties from
school
and family.
Parents
, as their first
mentor
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mentors
show examples
, play an important role in guiding the correct direction and providing mental
supports
Fix the agreement mistake
support
show examples
to
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
.
Submitted by bpcivvian on

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task achievement
Try to provide more clear and specific examples to support your points. While you've covered the necessary aspects, richer detail could enhance your response significantly.
general advice
Work on polishing your grammar and spelling. Even though your message is clear, minor inaccuracies can distract from your overall argument.
coherence and cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures more to make your essay more engaging to read. This also demonstrates a higher level of English proficiency.
structure
You've done a great job of structuring your essay with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
task response
You effectively discussed causes of teenager's difficulties and proposed solutions, fulfilling the task requirements well.
logic
Your essay flows logically, making your arguments easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • struggling
  • overwhelmed
  • challenging
  • cope
  • pressure
  • intimidation
  • supportive
  • effective communication
  • expectations
  • tension
  • compromise
  • negotiation
  • confrontation
  • addiction
  • screen time
What to do next:
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