Teenagers face a lot of difficulties at home and at school. What are the causes for this? How Can parents provide solutions?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Undoubtedly, not only adults,
teenagers
Correct word choice
but teenagers
show examples
face a variety of
pressure
Fix the agreement mistake
pressures
show examples
and
obstcles
Correct your spelling
obstacles
form daily
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
lives
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
. Normally, the
reson
Correct your spelling
reason
can be divided into two parts. One is the relationship with
classmates
Use synonyms
and family, another is the competition at
school
Use synonyms
and the expectation from
parents
Use synonyms
. These issues will be elaborated on as follows.
First,
Linking Words
one
significent
Correct your spelling
significant
reason that causes
teengers
Correct your spelling
teenagers
feel
Add the particle
to feel
show examples
stressed is the serious competition at
school
Use synonyms
. To be more specific, the
comparing
Replace the word
comparison
show examples
between
classmates
Use synonyms
is much more
sever
Correct your spelling
severe
show examples
than we think. At
school
Use synonyms
, young
children
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
required to get a higher score in class since a better score represents a higher-salary job and
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
life in the future. The pressure from
school
Use synonyms
and
parents
Use synonyms
give
Verb problem
puts
show examples
a huge burden
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers. Another
difficulties
Replace the adjective
difficulty
show examples
that students need to deal with is the relationship between friends and
parents
Use synonyms
.
School
Use synonyms
is a place
requires
Correct pronoun usage
that requires
show examples
a lot of teamwork and cooperation with
classmates
Use synonyms
. It
gives
Verb problem
puts
show examples
pressure
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
young
children
Use synonyms
,
expecially
Correct your spelling
especially
in the
teenager
Replace the word
teenage
show examples
age, in which take
friends
Change noun form
friends'
friend's
show examples
and
classmates
Use synonyms
' comments seriously.
Parents
Use synonyms
, as the first teacher of
child
Add an article
the child
show examples
, were expected to give some suggestions and solutions to
child
Add an article
the child
a child
show examples
. As for my perspectives, I agree with the idea based on the understanding of
child
Correct article usage
the child
show examples
and the role
modle
Correct your spelling
model
parents
Use synonyms
played. Normally,
parents
Use synonyms
have more connections with kids since they were
borned
Correct your spelling
born
on the earth and that helps
parents
Use synonyms
to know the
children
Use synonyms
's personalities better.
Parents
Use synonyms
can offer their opinions and solutions to help
children
Use synonyms
accourding
Correct your spelling
according
to the differences between
children
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, teenagers suffer a variety of difficulties from
school
Use synonyms
and family.
Parents
Use synonyms
, as their first
mentor
Fix the agreement mistake
mentors
show examples
, play an important role in guiding the correct direction and providing mental
supports
Fix the agreement mistake
support
show examples
to
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
.
Submitted by bpcivvian on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Try to provide more clear and specific examples to support your points. While you've covered the necessary aspects, richer detail could enhance your response significantly.
general advice
Work on polishing your grammar and spelling. Even though your message is clear, minor inaccuracies can distract from your overall argument.
coherence and cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures more to make your essay more engaging to read. This also demonstrates a higher level of English proficiency.
structure
You've done a great job of structuring your essay with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
task response
You effectively discussed causes of teenager's difficulties and proposed solutions, fulfilling the task requirements well.
logic
Your essay flows logically, making your arguments easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • struggling
  • overwhelmed
  • challenging
  • cope
  • pressure
  • intimidation
  • supportive
  • effective communication
  • expectations
  • tension
  • compromise
  • negotiation
  • confrontation
  • addiction
  • screen time
What to do next:
Look at other essays: