IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Your friend asked you to find a part-time job for him/her to earn some money while studying. You found a job that might be suitable for him/her. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter •give him/her the job description; •explain why he/she should take the job; •say what he/she should do to get the job.

#friend #job #money #•give #description #•explain #•say
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Dear Kumar, I’m writing
this
 letter to let you know that there is a job available in one of the esteemed companies. I hope
this
 mail finds you well. Recently, you requested me to find part-time employment on your behalf. Yesterday, when I was checking my work portal for my pay slip purpose, suddenly I noticed that they published a technical support job position in my firm. Basically, you need to attend the inbound calls of every customer and you need to resolve the issue by using the firm’s resources.
Furthermore
, I know that you have experience in
this
 field and
also
 you have enough knowledge to handle the customer in various situations. Apart from that, I do know that you have completed the professional certification for
this
 type of job.
Hence
, getting an offer letter for
this
 position will be easy for you.
Finally
, I would like to share the recommended ways to deserve
this
 position.
First,
I will apply for
this
 employment using my reference.
Second,
I suggest you contact my manager through social media platforms and share some of your special skills with them.
As a result
, once you complete the interview process. They might offer you employment in the company. I hope you can understand my suggestions and look forward to hearing from you soon. All the best, Sam
Submitted by jeeveshkb22 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure to maintain a clear and consistent structure throughout your letter, organizing your ideas logically and clearly transitioning between them.
task achievement
Focus on fully developing each point with relevant details and examples to enhance task achievement. Aim to address all parts of the prompt comprehensively.
writing tone
You have effectively used a friendly yet professional tone throughout the letter, which is suitable for the task.
greeting and closing
Your introduction and conclusion are well-framed, providing a clear opening and closing to your letter.
task response
The job description and steps on how to acquire the job are clearly articulated, fulfilling the task requirements.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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