Research shows that business meeting, discussion and training are happening online nowadays.Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantage?
Researchers illustrate that lately,commercial, discussions and learning
is
done virtually. Some claim that Correct subject-verb agreement
are
this
has a positive impact while
others think conversely
. This
essay,
will argue that the advantages outweigh the drawbacks. It will Remove the comma
apply
firstly
, demonstrate that the method is time
and fund saving
, followed by its primary Add a hyphen
fund-saving
disadavantage
namely loss of physical contact.
With Correct your spelling
disadvantage
advanced
technological era, Correct article usage
the advanced
it is clear that
worlwide
, individuals have settled Correct your spelling
worldwide
in
doing Change preposition
into
majority
of activities online Add an article
the majority
a majority
such
as education, discussion and business meetings. This
has in return led to saving of time
and money that could be used in travelling to and from the meeting point. For instance
, the World Health Organzation
is able to do continued education programs Correct your spelling
Organization
to
nurses and clinicians through virtual programs Change preposition
for
and
Correct word choice
apply
hence
leading to quality patient care as the staff can study during spare
Correct pronoun usage
their spare
time
. Without this
, there could be a gap since hospital work is engaging and therefore
some employees may lack enough time
to get to the meetings whereas
other
may lack funds to facilitate transport.
Fix the agreement mistake
others
On the contrary
, this
trend has led to loss
of physical contact since there is satisfaction from meeting online. Add an article
the loss
a loss
Additionally
, it is difficult to tell one
's emotions if you don't have a face to face
interaction.
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
For example
, as a teacher one
needs to understand the weakness of their students but teaching through this
platform may not provide this
knowledge due to
the distance. However
, when their
is Replace the word
there
one
on Correct pronoun usage
apply
one
session it is possible to know the audience's reaction and act wisely but Correct your spelling
one-on-one
this
can be solved by making sessions more engaging and being a sharp tutor.
In conclusion, Correct article usage
the lose
lose
of physical contact should not make us overlook the dire pros of Replace the word
loss
zoom
meetings namely Capitalize word
Zoom
time
and cost effectiveness
. Add a hyphen
cost-effectiveness
Therefore
in my opinion the benefits bare
more weight Verb problem
bear
that
the demerits.Correct your spelling
than
Submitted by rebecckwamboka96 on
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Grammar & Spelling
Be careful with typographical and grammatical errors, such as 'worlwide' should be 'worldwide', and 'lose of physical contact' should be 'loss of physical contact'. These small inaccuracies can distract from your overall message.
Coherency Enhancement
Use a wider range of linking words to make transitions smoother between paragraphs and within sentences. This will improve the flow of your essay.
Example Detailing
Consider adding more specific examples to support your arguments. You have made some great points, but additional examples could provide stronger evidence for your claims.
Argument Depth
Avoid generalizations without clear evidence. For instance, when discussing the disadvantages, being more specific about the challenges of interpreting emotions online would strengthen your argument.
Content Structure
Your essay presents a well-structured argument that clearly supports the idea that the advantages of online meetings, discussions, and training sessions outweigh the disadvantages.
Intro & Conclusion
You have effectively used an introductory paragraph to set the scene for your discussion and a conclusion to summarize your arguments, reflecting good task achievement.
Real-World Examples
The use of practical examples, such as the World Health Organization's virtual programs, demonstrates your ability to connect theory with real-world application.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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