Smacking children to is the best method to discipline. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Disciplining

children

is the one of important things to do as the guardian, without discipline,

children

will be uncontrollable and difficult to deal with. One of the methods to make them disciplined is to smack them, despite that method working, I personally disagree because is not good for

children

's behaviour. It might lead them to become a bully or have mental issues when they get older.

To begin

with,

children

tend to mimic their parent’s behaviour. If their parents choose violence to discipline

children

this

could lead

children

to duplicate their actions towards others.

For instance

, if parents hit a teenager, they might have a feeling to fight back and they release

this

feeling through a fight with their friends because they assume that hitting a person is a good thing to do which can lead to the act of bullying.

Besides

that, abusing

children

in terms of disciplining them tends to make them afraid and lead them to isolate from people because they think people will hit them every time they make a mistake.

Furthermore

this

behaviour will lead

children

to have anxiety and mental issues.

For example

, many adolescents have trauma

as a result

of abusive parents when they are younger age. In conclusion, abusing

children

is not the best way to make them more disciplined,

moreover

Add a comma

moreover,

show examples

it will lead them to the wrong behaviours in the future.

In addition

, violence is not the answer to training them to become better human beings because they will carry the trauma until they adults.

Submitted by ers.2024 on Thu Apr 11 2024

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Smacking children to is the best method to discipline. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, people wear more western-style clothes (suits and jeans) than their traditional clothes. Why is this the case? Is it a positive or negative development?

Many drinks and ready meals contain a lot of sugar, salt and other non healthy ingredients. Do you think governments should try and control this development? Give reasons for your answer.

Some people say that drug companies have a responsibility to spend money on researching medicines that will help people in poorer countries. Others say the main responsibility of drug companies is to make money. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

A healthy person is often described as someone who has a good diet, gets plenty of exerciseand avoids stress.What should people do to stay healthy in your country? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.