Some parents think that childcare centers provide the best services for children of pre-school age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better careers for their kids.
There are two opinions, some
people
think that centers
provide for Change the spelling
centres
children
is better than family members. Other
believe Fix the agreement mistake
Others
on the contrary
. To be honest, my opinion, that
professional workers for Add a missing verb
is that
baby
are the most competent Fix the agreement mistake
babies
then
members’ extended family. Correct your spelling
than
Such
employees trained
to work with kids.
Add a missing verb
are trained
One
the one hand, some Correct your spelling
On
people
think that grandparents
will be better careers for their children
for reasons such
as parenting experience, love
of others. They truly believe that their infant Correct word choice
and love
pre-school
age be safe with adult relatives at Correct your spelling
preschool
home
. Because there are a lot of happening related with
bad Change preposition
to
relationship
with Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
baby
in the nursery.
Fix the agreement mistake
babies
For example
, I have
read about Unnecessary verb
apply
beating
of 4 Add an article
the beating
years
Correct your spelling
4-year-old
child
during lunch with teacher
in the kindergarten in Moscow city 1 year ago. Correct article usage
a teacher
Also
Add a comma
Also,
children
in
Change preposition
at
young
age often get sick, so kids regularly stay at Add an article
a young
home
with adults. That’s many
Rephrase
why many
people
prefer staying at home
with grandparents
.
One
the other hand, the opponents of Correct your spelling
On
this
believe that grandparents
are worse in the bringing up than centers
provide for Change the spelling
centres
Add an article
the child
a child
child
. I Fix the agreement mistake
children
also
think that the day care
Correct your spelling
daycare
center
is better because there are workers, Change the spelling
centre
which
know, how Fix the agreement mistake
who
work
with young Add the particle
to work
people
and there is program
Correct article usage
a program
Change preposition
for pre-school
pre-school
education.
Correct your spelling
preschool
For example
, kids which
go to Correct pronoun usage
who
pre-school
Correct your spelling
preschool
center
are the most adapted than Fix the agreement mistake
centers
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
brings
up at Wrong verb form
brought
home
. They are more social
active and independent than their peers, Change the adjective
socially
which
live with family. Fix the agreement mistake
who
Also
they have never had trouble with Add a comma
Also,
study
.
In conclusion, some Add an article
the study
people
think that grandparents
will take care of their child
than kindergartens. But other
, including me, believe that Fix the agreement mistake
others
children
must socialize and attend educational institutions when they are at an early age.Submitted by alexareptile on
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Introduction
Try to explicitly state your thesis in the introduction to clearly present your viewpoint.
Sentence Structure
Work on variety and complexity of sentence structures for better coherence.
Paragraph Development
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and develop it fully with specific examples or explanations.
Grammar & Punctuation
Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation to avoid misunderstandings.
Argument Development
Consider contrasting arguments more thoroughly to strengthen your position.
Balanced Discussion
You have presented both sides of the argument, which is good for a balanced discussion.
Use of Examples
Providing examples to support your points helps make your essay more persuasive.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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