Some people believe that old buildings should be protected by law. Others, however, think that they should be replaced by new buildings. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
These days, there are so many historical
places
have been destroyed to expand more residential areas. However
, several places
are legarly
protected, so these cannot be demolished. Some argue that the legal requirements should be applied to keep the old Correct your spelling
legally
buildings
while
others feel that rebuilding shuld
be allowed. In my opinion, historical Correct your spelling
should
buildings
are significantly important because that
Correct pronoun usage
they
brings
more Correct subject-verb agreement
bring
people
to visit these places
and has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
economical
benefits. Replace the word
economic
This
essay explore
the reasons behind Change the verb form
explores
this
and provide
some examples.
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
To begin
with, I strongly believe that governments should not allow people
to remove ancient buildings
. One of the reasons is that many historical places
often have stories about how these were built. These allow us to discover the histroy
of ancestors and their unique culture. Another reason is that Correct your spelling
history
people
are interested to see historical places
and in many cases, these are famous tourist spots. For example
, Kyoto in Japan is one of the famous
tourist Correct quantifier usage
most famous
place
in the world because there are various historical Change to a plural noun
places
buildings
such
as shrines and templs
. Correct your spelling
temples
templates
Therefore
, there are lots of people
visit
the Wrong verb form
visiting
places
every year and it brings a huge economical
advantage for the country.
Correct word choice
economic
On the other hand
, it is also
important to replace some old buildings
to implement a
new development in areas. Correct article usage
apply
Firstly
, global
population keeps rising nowadays,Add an article
the global
a
lack of housing is one of the issues. It Correct word choice
and a
often
Add a missing verb
is often
neccessorily
to knock down old Correct your spelling
necessary
houses
to expand more residential areas. Additionally
, sometimes old houses
can cause human disasters, such
as earthquakes. For instance
, there was a massive earthquake in Japan in 2009 and lots of old houses
were destroyed. However
, after the earthquake, the government funded
to Add a hyphen
government-funded
rebuild
Replace the word
rebuilding
new
Change preposition
of new
houses
stronger which cannot easily be damaged by natural disaster
. Fix the agreement mistake
disasters
Hense
, old Correct your spelling
Hence
buildings
shoud
be built for safety in Correct your spelling
should
same
cases.
In conclusion, there are some advantages to Correct your spelling
some
keep
historical Change the verb form
keeping
places
such
as economical
benefits Replace the word
economic
while
some disadvantages should be considered because of a
risk of Correct article usage
the
damages
to the Fix the agreement mistake
damage
buidings
. I think the advantages still outweigh the drawbacks and Correct your spelling
buildings
building
law
should not allow to replace the old Correct article usage
the law
houses
easily.Submitted by chia.8ee on
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Coherence and Cohesion
It's great that you've provided a clear introduction and conclusion that reflect your main arguments. To improve, ensure your essay flows smoothly by using a wider range of linking words and phrases.
Task Achievement
Your essay successfully addresses the task, presenting a balanced view and your own opinion clearly. For a higher score, aim for more elaboration on your points with detailed examples and explanations.
Task Achievement
You've demonstrated a good understanding of the topic by discussing both sides of the argument and providing relevant examples. This enhances your essay's persuasiveness.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay's structure is clear, with a well-defined introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. This makes your arguments easy to follow.
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