The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The pie chart offers a glimpse into the causes of worldwide
land
degradation
by category, with the accompanying table
presents
Wrong verb form
presenting
show examples
the same issue by region, namely North America, Europe and Oceania. Multiple factors
contributes
Change the verb form
contribute
show examples
to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
land
degradation
worldwide, among which over-grazing plays the most crucial role,
resposible
Correct your spelling
responsible
for 35% of the
overall
land
degradation
. The negative impact brought by deforestation and over-cultivation cannot be neglected as well, constituting 30% and 28% of the
degradation
respectively. The remainder is shared by different factors, occupying 7% in total.
Howver
Correct your spelling
However
, the
overall
trend may mask considerable variations when dissected by region. A closer look at the table reveals that over-grazing remains the main factor of
degradation
only in Oceania, with a share of 11.3% of the 13% of total
land
degarded
Correct your spelling
degraded
regarded
.
While
Europe holds the largest
land
degraded at 23%, the main reason stands
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
deforestation at 9.8%, as over-cultivation and over-grazing
also
pose
considerable
Add an article
a considerable
show examples
threat to
land
degradation
at 7.7 and 5.5 respectively. Only 5% of
land
is degraded in North America, with over-cultivation
contributes
Wrong verb form
contributing
show examples
a notable 3.3%,
while
deforestation holds the lowest share.
Overall
, the cause of
land
degradation
can be multifaceted, each
countries
Change to a singular noun
country
show examples
should positively
adapting
Change the verb form
adapt
be adapting
show examples
measures to local conditions.
Submitted by nightrkatsiteli on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall, while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words land, degradation with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "considerable" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pie chart
  • Table
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Decreasing productivity
  • Reasons
  • Regional variations
  • Data
  • Summarize
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