In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decresing. Do you think this is a positive/negative development?

This
topic describes many countries that have made some mistakes in dropping the population in the countryside so many
people
migrate to urban .in
this
essay, I try to give my opinion and I will spare my ideas.
Firstly
,
people
almost farm in the countryside because that has a lot of water and fields .
thus
they can produce food for
people
or animals.
whereas
in the city
people
work in factories.
secondly
,
cities
have unlimited placement, so when other
people
travel to the city, they need a house or residence to live in. government must invest in
builting
Correct your spelling
building
houses meanwhile, that face empty rural.
On the other hand
, since many
people
need something that they have in big
cities
, young rural
people
enjoy living in the big
cities
. crowding
due to
rural
people
is not logical for citation; there are many arguments between the two communities. after that, social safety may need to
support
Wrong verb form
be supported
show examples
with many policies.
for
Capitalize word
For
show examples
example in many Western
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
many innocents
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
rural
people
.if we back and see again. key to the rise of arguments is the rising migration in big
cities
. In conclusion, my opinion is a negative development ,
such
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
as I wish to avoid the rise of poor
people
but when rural
people
go to the
cities
they get many
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
show examples
.in
whole
Correct article usage
the whole
show examples
world
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
government
Fix the agreement mistake
governments
show examples
have many
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
show examples
about crowd
Change preposition
with crowded
show examples
cities
as polite ,
healthy
Correct word choice
and healthy
show examples
but they can solve these problems
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
. And I think the government can get some facilities for rural
people
and try to help those
people
.
Submitted by poriaprashidi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure
Try to organize your ideas more clearly, ensuring that each paragraph discusses a specific aspect of the topic without repeating information or ideas.
Content
To improve task achievement, ensure your response directly addresses the question, providing a balanced discussion with clear, relevant examples.
Linking
For better coherence and cohesion, use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly and make your paragraphs flow logically.
Detail
To achieve higher scores, work on developing your ideas further with supporting details and examples. This will make your essay more persuasive and comprehensive.
Grammar
Remember to proofread your essay to correct any grammatical errors or inconsistencies, as this will improve the overall clarity and professionalism of your writing.
Opinion
You provided a stance in your conclusion, showing your ability to express an opinion.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!