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Band 6.5

The chart below shows the amount of time that 10 to 15-year-olds spend chatting on the Internet and playing on games consoles on an average school day in the UK.

The chart below shows the amount of time that 10 to 15-year-olds spend chatting on the Internet and playing on games consoles on an average school day in the UK.
#amount #time #internet #games #consoles #school #uk
The bar graph illustrates how much
time
 children between 10 to 15 years old spend chatting on the Internet and playing video
games
 on
gadgests
Correct your spelling
gadgets
 on an average school day in the UK.
Overall
, it is evident that
boys
 on average spend more
time
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
playing
games
 than
girls
,
whereas
,
girls
 devote more
time
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 chatting than
boys
. Regarding online chatting, nearly two-thirds of
girls
 use their tools for chatting
while
this
 figure stands at around 55% for
boys
.
furthermore
, the vast majority of both genders spend 1-3 hours
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 it, about 25% and 35% for
boys
 and
girls
 respectively.
Aprroximately
Correct your spelling
Approximately
 a quarter of both
genders
Change noun form
gender's
genders'
show examples
 chatting
time
 is less than an hour. A mere 5
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
boys
 stand in the 4 hours plus range and for
girls
 it
around
Add a missing verb
is around
show examples
 4% higher than that. In terms of playing video
games
Change the noun form
game
show examples
 devices, A huge gap
among
Change preposition
between
show examples
 genders in
notabale
Correct your spelling
notable
.
While
 85% of guys play video
games
 daily on
averagem
Correct your spelling
average
, just above half of the
girls
 do so. For
higher
Add an article
the higher
a higher
show examples
 proportion of
boys
Add a comma
boys,
show examples
 the
time
 spent stands in
1
Correct article usage
the 1
show examples
-3 range whilst it is less than an hour for the other gender.
Submitted by soroush.nezami on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words time, games, boys, girls with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "stands" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • adolescents
  • chatting online
  • games consoles
  • average school day
  • time allocation
  • social interaction
  • gaming habits
  • internet usage
  • preference
  • daily patterns
  • peak times
  • weekdays
  • weekends
  • gender differences
  • trends
  • implications
  • social skills
  • physical health
  • academic performance
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