In this technological era, personal information is stored on computers by many companies and organizations. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
The relationship between privacy and technological advancement has received a great amount of attention worldwide in the
last
20 years. In the contemporary era, many organizations and companies have kept private information
on computers
or online. This
essay will elaborate on the significance of this
notion.
On the one hand, keeping information
on computers
has many positive impacts. In other words
, if companies store data on computers
, not only can they manage their staff information
efficiently but they also
can save time in order to find desired information
in documents at the office and access information
quickly. However
, it should not be forgotten that almost all organizations have an online database for their customer's information
and this
way of keeping information
lead
to improved customer service. Fix the agreement mistake
leads
For example
, when you go to the hospital, bank and other government offices they access your information
and solve your problem due to
the database of personal information
.
On the other hand
, despite the fact that storing information
on computers
has many benefits for companies, there is the
concern related to protecting Correct article usage
a
information
. To support this
statement there is a high risk of database breaches. For instance
, numerous research have
consistently found that a significant amount of personal Change the verb form
has
information
databases have been stolen on the dark web every day. The more maintaining of personal information
on computers
, the higher the level of risk of stealing information
from hackers and criminals.
To conclude
, also
there is a high level of risk of misusing personal information
by keeping it on computers
. The benefits of them far outweigh the drawbacks.Submitted by TUTOO on
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Task Achievement
Remember to provide more specific examples to further illustrate your points. Adding real-world instances or statistics can strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Focus on varying your sentence structures to improve readability and make your essay more engaging. Experiment with complex sentences and a mix of simple and compound structures.
General
Double-check your essay for minor grammatical errors or typos to enhance its overall clarity and professionalism.
Structure
Well-structured essay with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
Content
Effective use of comparison between the advantages and disadvantages of storing information on computers.
Task Response
Successful in addressing the prompt with a balanced view on the topic.
Your opinion
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?