the plans below show the layout of the ground floor of a museum in 1990 and in 2010.

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Contained in the blueprints is the information pertaining to changes that took place
in
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on
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a museum's ground floor between 1990 and 2010. From an observational perspective, the museum has installed more recreational areas
as well as
rearranged some objects to make it more convenient for visitors. Ad
ditionally
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Additionally
, the local and natural rooms, the office and the stairs remained unchanged. To start with the right-hand side, there used to be an archaeology gallery in the top right corner but it was repurposed and split into the children's interactive zone and the poster display area.
Furthermore
, the door connecting the archaeology and the local history room was removed.
However
, the local history room stayed the same. Moving onto the middle part and the left-handed side, the statue which was situated next to the stairs in 1990 was relocated to the center of the museum in 2010.
Moreover
, the entry door was extended and the reception desk was set up closer to the entrance.
In addition
, the gift shop was enlarged and added a new function to make it a coffee and gift shop. Beside the cafe, a lift was built in order to enhance travelling.
Nevertheless
, the natural room and the office remained in place.
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Structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. Briefly introduce the changes in the museum's layout at the beginning and provide a summary or final thoughts at the end to round off the essay.
Language Variety
Work on varying your sentence structures and incorporating a wider range of vocabulary to make your descriptions more vivid and engaging.
Task Response
To improve your task achievement score, make sure to address all parts of the prompt comprehensively. If the task asks for comparisons, try to clearly juxtapose the situations of different years.
Coherence
Consider using more precise linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between sections of your essay, thereby improving coherence.
Structure
You've used an effective structure to organize the essay, discussing the changes systematically.
Clarity
Your descriptions of the museum's modifications are clear, helping the reader visualize the changes.
Task Achievement
You've successfully conveyed the main changes that occurred between 1990 and 2010, fulfilling the task's requirements.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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