n many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?
At the present age, technology is being invested in by the national government to handle the public. The author of
this
essay believes that this
is occurring due to
the need. of finding effective approaches and this
government spending is reasonable owing to increasing knowledge and productivity
.
It is acknowledged that governments' motives for spending on technological advancement are to augment efficiency. This
is because administrations f s may have the ability to broaden the scope for smarter, more productive, and more collaborative approaches. As a result
, problems can be solved and productivity
can be enhanced. Covid-19
, Correct your spelling
COVID-19
for instance
, gives governments further
motivation for policies, improve
health treatments and Wrong verb form
improving
strengthen
the national economy.
It is vital to understand that investing Wrong verb form
strengthening
on
technological devices is beneficial to humans Individuals have chances to upgrade Change preposition
in
gbbel
stock of Correct your spelling
their
browledge
, Correct your spelling
knowledge
nations
can be equipped with technological tools to scale up Correct word choice
and nations
productivity
As aconsequend
, countries can have a chance to enrol Correct your spelling
consequent
consequence
Correct your spelling
in a national
international
Change preposition
in inanational
inanational
competition with one another to prove that they are a developed country Take Viet Nam as an example Correct your spelling
international
goverment
provides high-tech devices in every Correct your spelling
government
aspects
to enhance Change to a singular noun
aspect
productivity
To sum
up
everything Add a comma
up,
has
been illustrated, more effective approaches Correct pronoun usage
that has
is
a direct consequence of spending on Correct subject-verb agreement
are
productivity
of Add an article
the productivity
nations
technology. can be developedChange noun form
nations'
nation's
Submitted by [email protected] on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Ensure clearer and more direct responses to both parts of the question. While your stance is somewhat clear, directly addressing 'why' this spending is happening and 'if it is appropriate' with specific details could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the coherence of your essay by organizing your ideas more clearly. Introduce each paragraph with a topic sentence that clearly states the main idea, followed by supporting details and examples.
coherence cohesion
Avoid using overly complicated sentences that might make your points difficult to follow. Simplicity and clarity are key to conveying your message effectively.
task achievement
You've successfully outlined the benefits of government investment in technology, using relevant examples such as the response to Covid-19 and references to Vietnam.
coherence cohesion
You provided a conclusion that wraps up your essay's main idea, showing a good structure in presenting your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.