In many countries government are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why this is happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

Globally, many governments are interviewing in economics to boost innovation, generate new technologies and foster cutting-edge industries. These interventions can have positive or negative impacts.
Moreover
, they can expand knowledge,enhance productivity and spread the essential tools of global growth and development. I will discuss and give an opinion on
this
issue in my articles. It must be recognized that governments of nations aim to improve the Internet of
accessing
Replace the word
access
show examples
for some reasons.
Firstly
, as it provides a tremendous amount of information, many citizens could gain more knowledge and widen their horizons. Online courses,
for example
, enable media users to get degrees in different fields. Another significant benefit of improving networking is that it aids
ministry
Correct article usage
the ministry
show examples
to promote
Change preposition
in promoting
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
activities more widely and largely. Nowadays,
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
policies and economic integration can drive technological progress, but where the two can
also
conflict, there is an even greater need for international cooperation and rules to ensure that modern industrial policies are designed and
implement
Change the form of the verb
implemented
show examples
in ways that encourage positive-sum outcomes and discourage the promotion of one country's technological advance at the expense of others. On the
onehand
Correct your spelling
one hand
, national and technology can bring advantages to everyone if they raise up the global stock of knowledge and support countries with the tools of technology that they need to scale up productivity. In conclusion, the pros point is to make new technology for serving
human'slife
Correct your spelling
human life
condition. Meanwhile, the crucial thing is to meet the economic resources to serve the improvement.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure that your examples are directly relevant to the question asked and clearly support your arguments. This might involve providing more specific examples or statistics that directly relate to government investment in technology.
Coherence & Cohesion
For a higher score in coherence and cohesion, focus on improving the flow between paragraphs and ideas. Using a wider range of linking phrases and making sure each paragraph clearly relates to the central theme of the paragraph can help.
Introduction & Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-presented, but make sure the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points made in the essay, not introducing new ideas.
Balanced Argument
You successfully discussed both sides of the argument, reflecting a balanced view.
Use of Examples
Good use of examples to support your points, though they could be more specific.
Identification of Benefits
Efficiently identified potential benefits of government investment in technology, enhancing the argument's depth.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • governmental investment
  • enhance efficiency
  • accessibility
  • responsiveness
  • public services
  • progressive step
  • modernizing
  • quality of life
  • technological advancements
  • data management
  • policy decisions
  • streamlined processes
  • shift towards technology
  • digitization
  • digital divide
  • privacy
  • prioritization
What to do next:
Look at other essays: