some people think that children should only read academic book. other believe that reading books for pleasure is equally important. Discuss both views and give your opi nion.

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Nowaday
Correct your spelling
Nowadays

The word Nowaday doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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,many
parent
Change to a plural noun
parents

The singular countable noun parent follows the quantifier many, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

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think reading is good for their
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.But different
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types

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of
parent
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parents

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have
differen
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different

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opinion
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opinions

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.Some of them think
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should only read academic
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books

It seems that book may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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,and some of them believe that reading books for pleasure is equally important. In my opinion,absolutely reading academic
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books

It seems that book may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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can let the kid know more academic knowledge.First,they can know more
word
Fix the agreement mistake
words

It seems that word may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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,
Linking Words
Linking Words
also
Correct word choice
and also

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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understand professional knowledge like the
animals
Change noun form
animal's
animals'

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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behavious
Correct your spelling
behaviours
behaviour

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,how
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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plant
Fix the agreement mistake
plants

It seems that plant may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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grow up and how the world
working
Wrong verb form
works

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb working. Consider changing it.

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.It can improve their academic literacy.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma after the subordinating conjunction Although. Consider removing the comma.

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academic
Fix the agreement mistake
academics

It seems that academic may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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is really
usefully
Change the word
useful

Usefully seems to be the wrong part of speech for this context.

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,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply

It appears that the word but is unnecessary in this sentence. Consider removing it.

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actully
Correct your spelling
actually

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if the
kids
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

do not curious
on
Change preposition
about

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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it,it is hard to put the
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge

It appears that knowledges is an uncountable noun and should not be made plural. Consider changing the noun.

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deeply
in to
Join the words
into

It appears that the two words in and to should be one word.

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thie
Correct your spelling
their

If you don’t want thie to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains

It seems that brain may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. It the other side,I think reading books for
pleasureis
Correct your spelling
pleasure is
pleasure
pleasures

If you don’t want pleasureis to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

more important for
kids
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.Because the
chrildren
Correct your spelling
children

If you don’t want chrildren to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

can
chose
Change the verb form
choose

The verb chose after the modal verb can does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

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what they want to read,so they think they have the right to choose.That
make
Change the verb form
makes

The verb make does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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kids
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

feel
satisfy
Change the form of the verb
satisfied

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb satisfy. Consider changing it.

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,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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helps psychological development and
make
Change the verb form
makes

It appears that the subject pronoun it and the verb make are not in agreement. Consider changing the verb.

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emotionally
Correct pronoun usage
them emotionally

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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healthy.
Also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

reading what the
kids
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

like,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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might
development
Replace the word
develop

The word development doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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their
hobbtes
Correct your spelling
hobbies

If you don’t want hobbtes to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

.They can read all kinds of
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books

It seems that book may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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,
Correct word choice
and in
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Correct word choice
and in

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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in
Change the preposition
at
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the
end
Add the comma(s)
end,

It appears that you are missing a comma or two with the interrupter in the end. Consider adding the comma(s).

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they will know what they
Add a missing verb
are interest
show examples
Add a missing verb
are interest

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

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interest
Replace the word
interested
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in.At that time,
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents

It seems that parent may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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can help
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

develop their
stengths
Correct your spelling
strengths

If you don’t want stengths to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

can make plans for the
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's future. So,I think the content of academic books is
imporant
Correct your spelling
important

If you don’t want imporant to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

.But it is more important to meet
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
children
Change noun form
children's

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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interests.

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Coherence & Cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structure more to enhance readability.
Task Achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to support your arguments, which could make your points more persuasive.
General
Pay attention to spelling and grammar to ensure clarity and professionalism in your writing.
Structure
You provided a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively framed your discussion.
Content
You discussed both views as the prompt requested before providing your own opinion, demonstrating a good understanding of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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