IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph gives information about the percentage of the population if four different Asian countries living in cities between 1970 and 2020 with additional predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.

The graph gives information about the percentage of the population if four different Asian countries living in cities between 1970 and 2020 with additional predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.
#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line graph provides information about the proportion of inhabitants in four Asian countries who are living in downtowns from 1970 to 2020 with divination 2030 and 2040.
Overall
Linking Words
, there was
a
Change the article
an
show examples
increase in the population of 4 countries, and Malaysia had risen rapidly by the highest percentage 85 among the group. It
predict
Change the verb form
predicts
show examples
 that these cities will continue to grow in future. Malaysia and Philadelphia started with the same level about 30% of people living in cities in 1970.
Then
Linking Words
 Malaysia witnessed
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
rapid growth with cities holding roughly 75% of its population by 2020, in terms of
Philipenes
Correct your spelling
Philippines
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
with some variations between 35% and 45%.
Afterwards
Add a comma
Afterwards,
show examples
 Thailand grew for almost 20% of its inhabitants in 1979 compared to
Indonesia
Change noun form
Indonesia's
show examples
 15%.
Linking Words
Nonetheless
Add a comma
Nonetheless,
show examples
 the population of Indonesia
risen
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 rapidly in 2020,
while
Linking Words
 Thailand’s proportion grew by 30%. In
future
Add a comma
future,
show examples
 it predicts there will be growth in four countries
Submitted by xadichaabd on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rapidly" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: