Some people believe zoos are good places for people to learn about animals. Other people believe animals belong in nature and it is wrong to keep them in zoos. What do you think? Explain, giving specific reasons for your choice.

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In the third millennium, protecting

Change preposition

apply

show examples

animals

Use synonyms

is one of

most

Correct article usage

the most

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burning issues.

Openinions

Correct your spelling

Opinions

about how ought to keep

species

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are divided as to

wheter

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whether

keep

Fix the infinitive

to keep

show examples

them inside an isolated environment or leave

animals

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alone in

nature

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Hence

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

essay will delve into details of both

point

Change to a plural noun

points

show examples

of view and provide some

tentalizing

Correct your spelling

tantalizing

tantalising

reasons why

zoos

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have better

condition

Fix the agreement mistake

conditions

show examples

. On the one hand,

proponent

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proponents

show examples

of keeping

animals

Use synonyms

zoos

Use synonyms

would claim that it is more advantageous for them. One justification often given for

this

Linking Words

is the role of protection. To clarify, nowadays, many

species

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are at

the

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apply

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risk of

extincation

Correct your spelling

extinction

likewise

Linking Words

, Persian tigers and African lions.

Therefore

Linking Words

zoos

Use synonyms

might be a

sutitable

Correct your spelling

suitable

home

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for

show examples

feeding them

appropriatly

Correct your spelling

appropriately

, providing medicine

equipments

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equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

, keeping them

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apply

show examples

safe, and ultimately ensuring

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apply

show examples

their

survive

Replace the word

survival

show examples

Furthermore

Linking Words

, another

factore

Correct your spelling

factor

which has led

choose

Wrong verb form

to choosing

show examples

zoos

Use synonyms

Change the article

show examples

acceptable

envronment

Correct your spelling

environment

for faunas is the value of

investigation

Add an article

the investigation

show examples

. Needless to say, the burden

responsibility

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of responsibility

show examples

for researching

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apply

show examples

animal

kins

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kin

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lies in the hands of

zoos

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Thus

Linking Words

, many

scinetists

Correct your spelling

scientists

and biologists work in

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zoos'

Fix the agreement mistake

zoo'

show examples

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

show examples

in order to discover

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apply

show examples

new

exploration

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explorations

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, the cutting-edge technology of DNA

have

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has

show examples

been extracted by studying

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apply

show examples

species

Use synonyms

On the other hand

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although

Linking Words

many people

are generally agree

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generally agree

show examples

Change preposition

with

show examples

positive

Correct article usage

the positive

show examples

implications of

zoos

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just

Rephrase

only

show examples

a few would deny

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

nature

Use synonyms

as the first home of

animals

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. Clearly, faunas

born

Add a missing verb

are born

show examples

in the

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nature

Replace the word

natural

show examples

environment and have inherited attachment to their inborn conditions.

As a result

Linking Words

, some

abnormallies

Correct your spelling

abnormalities

may be

accured

Correct your spelling

accrued

when a creature

Correct your spelling

has

hase

Add the auxiliary verb

hase has

show examples

been

seprated

Correct your spelling

separated

from

nature

Use synonyms

Subsequently

Linking Words

, it may be conceded living

animals

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in their own habitat can keep the balance of

nature

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Moreover

Linking Words

zoos

Use synonyms

are

proved

Correct your spelling

proven

show examples

as a costly environment for the government.

Undeniebly

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Undeniably

, taking care of various kinds

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

experts and advanced

equipments

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equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

need

Verb problem

apply

show examples

financial support and human resources.

Subsequently

Linking Words

, spending huge money to

protecting

Wrong verb form

protect

show examples

all

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apply

show examples

kinds

Add an article

the kinds

show examples

creaturs

Correct your spelling

creatures

show examples

may be considered

Correct your spelling

show examples

waste for people and governments

while

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

nature

Use synonyms

is free and available for any

kinds

Fix the agreement mistake

kind

show examples

Use synonyms

animals

Fix the agreement mistake

animal

show examples

To sum up

Linking Words

, with regard to the foregoing paragraphs it can be stated that

nature

Use synonyms

is free and

acessible

Correct your spelling

accessible

with ease for

species

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

zoos

Use synonyms

are money spending.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, my firm conviction is that

Use synonyms

zoos

Correct your spelling

the

show examples

situation would be more acceptable for

animal

Fix the agreement mistake

animals

show examples

in many facets like

invetigation

Correct your spelling

investigation

and protection.

mahdisonbolestanThu Apr 18 2024

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Introduction Clarity

Clarify your introduction by directly stating your stance on the issue. While your position becomes clearer throughout the essay, explicitly mentioning your viewpoint at the beginning would strengthen your argument.

Spelling and Grammar

Try to maintain accuracy with spelling and grammar. Minor errors are noted, such as 'Openinions' (should be 'Opinions'), 'extincation' (should be 'extinction'), and 'accured' (should be 'occurred'). These small inaccuracies can slightly distract from your overall message.

Cohesion

Use a wider range of cohesive devices to connect ideas more smoothly. While you've structured your essay with clear paragraphs, employing a greater variety of linking words could enhance the flow of your arguments.

Repetition and Variety

Be mindful of repetition in your explanations. Try to vary your language more to avoid redundancy, particularly when discussing the roles of zoos in protection and research.

Balanced Argument

You have provided well-developed arguments for both sides of the debate, showing a balanced consideration.

Relevant Examples

You successfully incorporated specific examples and reasons to support your points, such as the protection of endangered species and the role of zoos in research.

Effective Conclusion

Your conclusion effectively summarises your viewpoint, reinforcing your stance toward the preference for zoos based on their benefits for investigation and protection.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
62
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

381 words

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Some people believe zoos are good places for people to learn about animals. Other people believe animals belong in nature and it is wrong to keep them in zoos. What do you think? Explain, giving specific reasons for your choice.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vechiles outweigh the disadvantages?

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Some people believe that governments should prioritize spending on public services rather than arts such as music and painting. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries today the retirement age from work has been raised. Do the advantages of raising the retirement age outweigh the disadvantages?

Attending a live performance (for example, a play, concert, or sporting event) is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?