The chart below gives information about the journey to school by children aged 11 to 16 in the UK in a year Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information about the journey to school by children  aged 11 to 16 in the UK in a year

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar chart below
illustrate
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illustrates
show examples
the survey on the
distance
from children’s accommodation to school,
this
database
focus
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focuses
show examples
on children from 11 to 16 years old in the UK.
Overall
, the majority of children chose to walk or cycle for
journeys
that were 2
miles
or shorter
while
bus
Add an article
the bus
show examples
was the most common
options
Fix the agreement mistake
option
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for
Add an article
the student
a student
show examples
student
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students
show examples
who
traveled
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travelled
show examples
longer
distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
show examples
. Regarding commutes under 1 mile, cycling accounted for 80% of
journeys
surpassing the figure for walking by 20%.
Cars
and
buses
were less
favored
Change the spelling
favoured
show examples
for
this
distance
, each consisting of less than 25%. In the 1-2
miles
, cycling was still the most popular choice, making up about 55%.
Moreover
, 50% of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
journeys
belonged to
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
who walked, which doubled for
cars
and half for
buses
. Referencing
journeys
within 2 to 5
miles
,
buses
took up nearly 50% of
journeys
, followed by walking at 40%. And the figures
of
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for
show examples
cars
and
bicycle
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bicycles
show examples
shared the same level about 35%.
In addition
, concern
to
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apply
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communtes over 5
miles
,
buses
reamined
Correct your spelling
remained
the best choice, with around 70%, followed by
cars
closed
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close
show examples
to 50%,
whereas
walking and cycling were not chosen for
this
distance
with only 23% and 20% respectively.
Submitted by cathyngo1512 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Replace the words distance, journeys, miles, cars, buses with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Modes of transportation
  • Percentage
  • Comparative analysis
  • Seasonal variations
  • External factors
  • Environmental impact
  • Carbon emissions
  • Non-motorized modes
  • Safety
  • Convenience
  • Sustainable
  • Initiatives
  • Promoting
  • Improvements
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