Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behavior. What is your opinion?

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The debate over the impact of televised

violence

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and digital games on societal

behavior

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behaviour

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ignites strong opinions.

While

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some attribute a corrosive effect on societal norms to these

media

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forms, others question their significant influence.

This

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essay contends that

such

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content can indeed foster aggression and desensitization to

violence

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, focusing on the psychological implications and the erosion of

empathy

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as critical discussion points.

Firstly

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, the psychological effects of prolonged exposure to violent content cannot be understated. Studies have demonstrated that individuals, especially young people, who frequently engage

with

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violent television shows and video games exhibit increased aggression and hostility.

This

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is attributed to the normalization of

violence

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, where repeated exposure not only desensitizes individuals but

also

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embeds aggressive

behaviors

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behaviours

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as acceptable responses to conflict.

For instance

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, a research study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found a direct correlation between high consumption of violent

media

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and aggressive

behavior

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behaviour

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in adolescents, suggesting a mirroring effect where fiction bleeds into reality.

Moreover

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, the erosion of

empathy

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is a significant consequence of continuous engagement with violent

media

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. As viewers and players become accustomed to the brutality depicted in these formats, their ability to empathize with real-world suffering diminishes.

This

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detachment fosters a society less sensitive to the pain and needs of others, undermining social bonds and compassion. An illustrative example is the decrease in empathetic responses observed in individuals after playing a violent video game, as highlighted in a study by the University of Michigan.

This

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phenomenon illustrates how virtual

violence

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can numb the human capacity for

empathy

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, thereby impacting interpersonal relationships and societal cohesion. In conclusion, the assertion that

violence

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in television and computer games has a deleterious effect on society is well-founded. The documented psychological effects and the significant erosion of

empathy

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among consumers of

such

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content underscore the need for a nuanced understanding of

media

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consumption.

While

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it is essential to recognize the complexity of human

behavior

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behaviour

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, minimizing exposure to violent

media

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could mitigate these adverse effects, fostering a more compassionate and less aggressive society.

harshitkaur321Sat Apr 20 2024

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Enhancement of Argument

To further improve, aim to integrate a wider range of studies or real-life examples to substantiate your arguments even more compellingly. While the use of studies is strong, additional, varied examples could add further depth.

Balanced Discussion

Consider exploring a counterargument more deeply to show a balanced understanding before affirming your stance. Acknowledging and refuting opposing viewpoints can strengthen your argument's persuasiveness.

Structure

Your essay presents a well-structured and coherent argument, effectively using paragraphs to distinguish between different aspects of the topic.

Introduction & Conclusion

You've successfully introduced and concluded your essay, clearly stating your viewpoint and summarizing your argument, which supports a strong coherence and cohesion.

Use of Evidence

Your arguments are supported with relevant studies, which significantly strengthens your position on the impact of violence in media on societal behavior.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

338 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

proliferation
desensitize
empathetic response
aggressive behavior
formative years
impressionable
catharsis
media psychology
mixed results
family environment
genetics
regulatory bodies
rating systems
vulnerable demographics
inappropriate content

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Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behavior. What is your opinion?

Your opinion

Charitable organizations increasingly utilize the internet and television to promote their work, a trend driven by technological advancements. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this approach, and provide your opinion with relevant examples and evidence.

Some people believe that they should be able to keep all money they earn and should not pay any tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shipping. Is this a positive or a negative ?

Many people argue that restaurants should be required to disclose the nutritional information of the dishes they serve. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that children’s leisure activities must be educational, otherwise they are a complete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your experience.