The pie chart charts below shows the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013

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Overall

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, the illustration presents a general comparison between two pie charts with years 2003 and 2013, which are individually divided into four sections with respect to their retail online sales type. Primarily, the most noticeable aspect of these illustrations is a rise in total internet purchases in the mentioned percentage in film/music and book parts, from the previous year into the new one,

while

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in contrast

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, there is a rather decrease in sales associated to "travel" and "clothes" respectively.

In addition

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to the aforementioned data interpretation , another comparison can be made with regards to, exactly by how much in proportion levels the whole sales have fluctuated over both relevant periods,

firstly

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, we see the business or commercial type difference highest , in the film one coming at 12%

while

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for others it is as following; travelling 7% , clothing 8% and books 3%.

to sum up

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, we can see a considerable decrease in total consumption trend except one factor in question.

Submitted by toqeer44 on Sat Apr 20 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Vocabulary: The word "comparison" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.

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6
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

163 words

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The pie chart charts below shows the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013

In some places old age is valued, while in other culture youth is considered more importance. Discuss both views and give you opinion.

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying medicines and treatments by themselves instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Attending a live performance (for example, a play, a concert, or sporting event) is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?