IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Eating sweet foods produces acid in the mouth, which can cause tooth decay. (High acid levels are measured by low pH values) Describe the information below and discuss the implications for dental health. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You should write at least 150 words.

#foods #acid #mouth #tooth #decay #levels #ph #values #information #implications #health #minutes
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The line graph illustrates the
Ph
 values affected by acid levels in the mouth via
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
show examples
 of Fruit
sugar
 ,
cane
sugar
 and honey,which can
cause
 tooth decay.
Overall
,
it is clear that
 the consumption of all sweet foods in a short
time
 elapses witnessed not the
cause
 increase in acid
level
 at which tooth decay occurs,
while
 the opposite was true for eating sweet foods with long elapses. From the
time
 elapsed after eating
sugar
 5
minutes
 to below 15
minutes
, the
cane
sugar
 stood at 3.5
PH
level
, the lowest
Ph
level
 when compared to another two kinds of sweet
sugar
.
In addition
,
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the 3.5
Ph
level
 of
cane
sugar
 during
this
 period
time
, which can the most
cause
 tooth decay occurs. Meanwhile, Honey which the sweet
sugar
 the safest for the mount from 20
minutes
 to 25
minutes
time
 elapsed after eating
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
food contains
sugar
 with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 7
ph
Correct your spelling
pH
show examples
level
.
Additionally
, from 30
minutes
 onwards, Fruit
sugar
 and Honey remain
unchangedd
Correct your spelling
unchanged
 at 7
ph
Correct your spelling
pH
show examples
level
 and become
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
foods safe for the mouth.
However
,
cane
sugar
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
 the lowest food that
safe
Add a missing verb
is safe
show examples
 for the mouth, which can
cause
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the long
time
 elapsed after eating.
Submitted by anhyeuemvt142 on

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task response
Provide a clearer overview of the main trends, comparisons, and developments described in the data.
coherence cohesion
Aim to diversify your sentence structure to enhance readability and engagement.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clearer distinction between the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion for an improved structure.
coherence cohesion
Consider rephrasing sentences for clarity and to avoid repetition of phrases. This enhances understanding and keeps the reader engaged.
task response
Incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to express comparisons and describe trends more vividly.
task response
You effectively used data to support your points, which strengthens your argument.
task response
You have addressed the topic and provided relevant examples, which is crucial for task achievement.
task response
Your essay stays on topic and demonstrates an understanding of the task requirements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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