The US film industry has too much influence on the film industry around the world. Governments have a duty to invest money in their own film industries to protect and develop their cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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American
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films
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are very popular all over the world. Some
people
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think
this
Linking Words
is a bad thing and that governments should invest money in their
film
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industries to protect and develop culture. I think there are advantages to the
American
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film
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industry and I
also
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think governments should protect
film
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industries.
American
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film
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industry has a lot of money and
films
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are expensive
make
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to make
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.
However
Linking Words
, because they have money the
films
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are special and exciting and
people
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enjoy
films
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very much. Going to the cinema and seeing action
films
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or science fiction is amazing for lots
or
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of
show examples
people
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.
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Also
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Also,
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I learn English from watching
American
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films
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and I think
this
Linking Words
is good for the future. But
American
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films
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are all
American
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culture and
people
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all learn what is right for America. Because
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this
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of this
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, young
people
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now all want to be the same
like
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as
show examples
American
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film
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stars and have
the
Correct article usage
apply
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American
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life. I think that
this
Linking Words
is bad for some countries that have different
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
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and some things
maybe being
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may be
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lost. All
people
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want to dress the same and act the same. In
conclusion
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conclusion,
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I think the government can support
film
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industries in their country.
This
Linking Words
means many
people
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can learn traditional things and other values that are not in
America
Replace the word
American
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films
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.
This
Linking Words
would be very good for the
people
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.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
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many
people
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can
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
work in
films
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if there are
films
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made in your country.
However
Linking Words
, I think
American
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films
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are good for seeing in the cinema and
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
exciting for
people
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by sosokhurtsidzee on

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task achievement
Consider expanding your ideas with more detailed examples and explanations to fully develop your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Try to organize your essay into clear paragraphs with distinct introductions, body paragraphs, and conclusions to enhance readability.
general
Using a variety of sentence structures and more complex vocabulary can make your essay more engaging and demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.
content
You have provided a balanced view on the topic, discussing both advantages and disadvantages of the American film industry's influence.
structure
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your position, showing good essay structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Americanisation
  • Cultural imperialism
  • Local cinema
  • Cultural diversity
  • Cultural homogenization
  • Film subsidies
  • National identity
  • Artistic expression
  • Blockbusters
  • Cultural preservation
What to do next:
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