some people say that school children should learn how to grow food and cook with it in their lessons. what is your opinion about that?

This
is a good chance for
children
if education puts cooking and cropping in the school electives subject. Plants and food and basic but they are necessary for human life and economies. I believe
this
idea motivates the young group to seek themself and their opportunities in future. Most schools in Thailand provide cooking and planting in compulsory education because government and education agree with the opinion that
children
should learn about cooking and cropping for their basic
skills
. The young generation can absorb and develop both
skills
for their future so that they can survive in the world and get more opportunities when they develop
skills
to be professional.
Moreover
, some families, encourage their
children
to do cropping and cooking activities because of social and
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
. When teenagers work in a group
this
motivates them to improve their social
skills
and positive behavior
such
as patience and communication
skills
.
Besides
, plants and food are the primary economies of the world. The value of products is important and affects farmers and local economies. If the young group understand the value of the product, they might improve and develop a valuable product.
Due to
knowledge of
quality
, the
children
study planting and cooking lessons that make them understand
quality
is more important than quantity. Some countries control about
quality
of products because it affects to price and
then
to economy.
For example
, Japanese farmer
develop
Change the verb form
develops
show examples
quality
plants and food products because they need to add value to their product that
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
more income.
To sum up
, I agree with the concept
that
Change preposition
of
show examples
including cooking and cropping in the school curriculum because
children
gain benefits through their lessons and economic impact.
Submitted by baby11mystar on

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Grammar
It's a well-structured argument with a clear introduction, development, and conclusion, highlighting the importance of including cooking and cropping in education. However, there are some grammatical and syntactical errors that could be improved to enhance clarity.
Sentence Structure
Try to vary your sentence structure more to improve readability and make your essay more engaging. This includes making use of both complex and simple sentences.
Argument depth
To strengthen your argument, it might be beneficial to compare with examples where schools do not offer such programs and the potential drawbacks. This contrast could offer a more comprehensive view.
Linking Words
Work on using linking words more effectively to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs, which will enhance the overall coherence and cohesion of your essay.
Content Understanding
Effectively identified and explained the benefits of teaching cooking and cropping in schools, showing a good understanding of the topic.
Use of Examples
Good use of examples, particularly the reference to Thailand and Japan, which helps to provide evidence for your arguments.
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