some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. others disagree and think that the host contry should welcome cultural differences. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays Migration towards developed countries is rapidly increasing.
Due to
this
one part of the society argues that immigrants should always accept foreign region and their traditions.
while
other people counter that immigrant countries should learn and
value
their regional habits. I believe that society should accept the tradition of immigrants who move abroad.
To begin
with, civilization in a migration always plays a vital role in moving abroad. I totally agree that people should accept newcomer and their
way
of living, as in the
beginning
Add a comma
beginning,
show examples
it's very tough for them to adopt new customs.
For Example
. For a guy who moves
abroad
Add a comma
abroad,
show examples
it's very difficult for them to taste
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
new cuisine which he or she has never eaten.
Besides
this
, the costume is
also
a major concern as it's a matter of comfort for a person.
However
, visitors should respect the lifestyle of the country and should try to adopt the
way
of living. As
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
one should always give
value
to other habits and traditions.
Such
as the law and rules and regulations. a violation of
this
may create an imbalance in their respective culture.
For example
, Breaking the traffic rules can create congestion on the roads. So, following a code of conduct is extremely vital.
Nevertheless
, the resident
also
gives
value
to other heritage and cultures their foods and their
way
of living.
This
thing creates a positive impact on tourists. To illustrate, if a resident behaves in
good
Change the article
a good
show examples
manner with tourists they will stay for longer periods of time and indirectly they help to boost the economy by paying taxes.
To conclude
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
this
, after seeing both sides' arguments, I would say society always stands with people who come from a long
way
. In my opinion, most countries should accept cultural differences and give
value
to their own culture
Submitted by asifrathod662 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure & Clarity
Try to enhance clarity and precision in your essay by refining the structure of your sentences for greater coherence.
Lexical Resource
Incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to articulate your points more vividly and with greater nuance.
Paragraphing
Use clear paragraphing with distinct introduction, body, and conclusion sections to organize your ideas effectively.
Examples
Continue to provide specific examples to support your arguments, as doing so strengthens the credibility of your claims.
Task Response
You effectively addressed both views of the argument and provided a clear opinion, fulfilling the task requirements.
Use of Examples
Good use of examples to illustrate your points, enhancing the relevance and specificity of your arguments.
Logical Structure
Your essay demonstrates a logical structure, facilitating the reader's understanding of the argument.
Introduction & Conclusion Presence
You successfully provided an introduction and a conclusion, enhancing the overall cohesion and coherence of the essay.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: