Employers should not be concerned about the way their employees dress at work. They should only care about the quality of their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent
year
, many employers Fix the agreement mistake
years
would
Verb problem
have
like
to Wrong verb form
liked
dress
casual
at Change the adjective
casually
work
because the quality
of work
it
doesn't Correct pronoun usage
apply
concorned
how Correct your spelling
concerned
concern
people
dress
for work
. in this
statement , i
will explain in Change the capitalization
I
this
essay i
disagree it Change the capitalization
I
this
reason.
in term
of Fix the agreement mistake
terms
new
era , Correct article usage
the new
the
technology rapidly Correct article usage
apply
change
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changes
that
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and
company
reduce Fix the agreement mistake
companies
to hire
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hiring
people
. Therefore
, they are tried
to use computer Wrong verb form
trying
instance
of Fix the agreement mistake
instances
human
. Fix the agreement mistake
humans
for example
, in many contries
Correct your spelling
countries
publice
transport Correct your spelling
public
avoid
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avoids
to use
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using
people
to drive trians
and busesCorrect your spelling
trains
control
by Wrong verb form
controlled
AI
system . Add an article
an AI
the AI
In addition
, the quality
of work
it
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apply
doesn
,t reduce in Correct your spelling
does
regarding
Replace the word
regard
with
Change preposition
to
this
employers have to wear the
Correct article usage
a
uniform
that
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so that
people
can knonw
where Correct your spelling
know
do
you Unnecessary verb
apply
work
and what kind of job do work
. specially
, if you Replace the word
especially
work
for governments Correct pronoun usage
apply
that
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apply
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you
we
have to Correct pronoun usage
you
dress
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your
you
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your
informs
because Change the verb form
inform
people
can know where Correct pronoun usage
you
we
are working .
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you
In
the other hand , the Change preposition
On
company
dress
causal
Correct your spelling
casual
uniform
. in term
of Fix the agreement mistake
terms
this
company
has
fire the Wrong verb form
having
buiding
has collabs if we Correct your spelling
building
dress
casual uniform
it is difficult to check identities
information where you are from and what position Change the noun form
identity
do
you Unnecessary verb
apply
work
with
. Change preposition
in
hence
, we cannot contract people
has connection
with you Add an article
a connection
that
we should have Correct word choice
apply
rule
Correct your spelling
a
uniform
to dress
along with
easy to check who are you.
in conclusion , I completely disagree with statement
because if the government or Add an article
the statement
company
don't have their own uniforms it hard
to understand and check Add a missing verb
is hard
quality
of Add an article
the quality
work
in this
world we should
have to Verb problem
apply
work
along the rule
. It will have more Fix the agreement mistake
rules
quality
in thier
Correct your spelling
their
work
.Submitted by viewsoysoongnern on
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Structure
Consider structuring your essay more clearly with distinct paragraphs for introduction, arguments, and conclusion.
Coherence
Use topic sentences to clearly state the main idea of each paragraph, improving coherence.
Content
Provide specific, realistic examples to support your arguments for more effective persuasion.
Grammar & Vocabulary
Work on grammar and vocabulary to accurately convey your ideas. Errors in sentence structures and word choice can make the text difficult to understand.
Engagement with Topic
You engaged directly with the topic, demonstrating an understanding of its significance.
Positioning
Your willingness to express a clear position on the topic is commendable.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.