IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of population in four ASEAN countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of population in four ASEAN countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #percentage #population #four #asean #countries #cities #predictions #summarise #features #comparisons
The line graph explains
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
percentage
 of the
population
 people living in four ASEAN cities from 1970 to 2020
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and
prediction
Correct article usage
the prediction
show examples
 between 2030 and 2040. In general, the
percentage
population
 in Malaysia, Indonesia and Thailand increased.
In contrast
, in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
 decreased.
To begin
 with, in the first
period
, the
percentage
 of
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
population
 in Malaysia was bigger than
others
Correct article usage
the others
show examples
.
Then
, in 1990, in Malaysia growth slightly at almost 50%.
Subsequently
, the
percentage
 will be predicted
rise
Fix the infinitive
to rise
show examples
 in 2040
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 80%.
Similarly
, in Indonesia, in 1970, the
population
 at around 12%,
then
 in the next year in 1990 jumped
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 almost 30%. In
Indonesia
Add a comma
Indonesia,
show examples
 the
population
 will be picked up
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the end of
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
 at
almost
Add an article
an almost
the almost
show examples
 doubled
percentage
 (60%). As same as in Thailand, the total people
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the beginning of the year at around 20%,
then
 climbed
10
Change preposition
to 10
show examples
% in 1990. Next
period
, the
population
 will be reached
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
approximately 50
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
On the other hand
, the total
population
 in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
 in 1970 at 30%,
then
 in 1990, it
risen
Add the auxiliary verb
rose
has risen
show examples
 slightly
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 almost 50%.
However
, in the next
period
 in 2010 decreased significantly to 40%. And the
last
period
 will reach
at
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
50% total
population
.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, population, period with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: