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Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development

#people #health #alternative #medicines #treatments #doctor #development
Recently,
alternative
medicines
 and
treatments
becoming
Wrong verb form
have become
show examples
 more popular rather than visiting
usual
Add an article
a usual
the usual
show examples
 doctor. In my
oponion
Correct your spelling
opinion
,
this
 is a negative
develpoment
Correct your spelling
development
 because it
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 the
quality
 of
health
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
show examples
 and
unaffordable
Add a missing verb
is unaffordable
show examples
 for
peopple
Correct your spelling
people
 to access
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern
medication
. The increasing number of
people
 consuming
alternative
medicines
 shows the
quality
 of
health
 services. It can be said that before going to use
alternative
medicines
people
 usually go to
hospital
Correct article usage
a hospital
show examples
 or doctor to solve their
health
problems
.
Due to
 the fact that these attempts are costly and
people
 do not find the solution, they
then
 consume
alternative
medicines
. In many cases,
this
 kind of
medication
resolve
Correct subject-verb agreement
resolves
show examples
 their
problems
that
Correct word choice
and
show examples
bring
Verb problem
makes
show examples
 more
people
 want to do the same.
Therefore
, it is important to note that
this
practice
 is an alarm for
health
 services to increase their
quality
.
Furthermore
,
alternative
 medicine and
treatments
 tend to be more affordable compared to doctor's
recipe
Fix the agreement mistake
recipes
show examples
. Since
people
, particularly from low-income families, cannot access
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
specialist
Fix the agreement mistake
specialists
show examples
,
alternative
medicines
 and treatment are the most possible way to solve their
health
problems
. In many developing countries,
alternative
treatments
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 regarded as
traditional
Add an article
a traditional
the traditional
show examples
 way to resolve
health
problems
. There are many places where
this
practice
, usually older than modern
medication
,
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 more popular because more cheaper
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
 modern
medication
.
Furthermore
,
patiens
Correct your spelling
patients
 of
this
 kind of
health
practice
 can inform their family and others to do the same when
pacing
Correct your spelling
facing
show examples
health
problems
. In conclusion, the rising number of
people
 visiting
alternative
medicines
 and
treatments
 is a negative development because it is a
practice
 that
indicate
Change the verb form
indicates
show examples
 the
quality
 of
health
 services and
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 that modern
medication
 should pay
attenttion
Correct your spelling
attention
 to the cost that
frequently
Add a missing verb
is frequently
show examples
 more expensive than
alternative
medicines
 and
treatments
.
Submitted by salwafahanim on

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Improve the clarity of your main points by refining and focusing your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Check your essay for minor grammatical errors and consider revising for smoother flow and readability.
coherence cohesion
You've effectively introduced your topic and provided a conclusion that summarizes your viewpoints.
task achievement
The topic is relevant to the prompt, and you've maintained a consistent stance throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
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