In many countries, the rate of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with this?

#countries #rate #crime

In contemporary society,

crime

is one of the most considerable concerns and the rates of it have an upward trend.

This

essay will discuss some reasons for

this

problem and provide solutions to

this

Firstly

, the reason why

crime

is increasing day by day in many countries is that the governments do not implement harsh

laws

. To elaborate, if there are no strict rules in the law system,

crime

incidents will be likely to be widespread, on the ground that the

people

who want to steal money or kill someone would not fear, which makes it easier to be a member of a criminal organization.

For instance

, there are numerous criminal syndicates in Mexico

such

as “Cartel”, that are to blame for the drug trade.

Furthermore

, the poverty

level

also

plays an important role in the increasing tendency in

crime

rates. To be more specific,

this

contributing factor makes

people

turn to

crime

in order to pay bills and meet family responsibilities.

On the other hand

, to tackle

this

concern, governments should introduce stricter

laws

thus

leading

people

to obey the rules and avoid

crime

. Thanks to harsher implementations, the indicators of

crime

can be reduced which is advantageous for new generations.

Additionally

, the poverty

level

should be decreased by increasing social benefits, thereby leading to alleviation in

crime

rates.

Moreover

, employment is of paramount importance for citizen's

overall

well-being.

Hence

, the unemployment

level

should be stayed at the lowest numbers as soon as possible.

To conclude

, it is a lack of strictness of

laws

and poverty

level

In addition

, there are many solutions to solve

this

issue, including introducing harsher and harsher

laws

, improving social benefits, and making

people

employed.

Submitted by writingbhos on Wed Apr 24 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Relevance & Examples

Try to provide more detailed and varied examples to support your points. While you mentioned Mexico and its criminal organizations, diversifying your examples could make your argument more robust.

Task Response

Consider developing your ideas further to fully address both parts of the question. While you have offered solutions, exploring them in greater depth could improve your task achievement score.

Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure smoother transitions between paragraphs for better flow. Phrases that link ideas can help improve the readability and coherence of your essay.

Structure

You have a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your essay.

Content Coverage

Your essay addresses both the causes of rising crime rates and potential solutions, covering the main aspects of the prompt.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: People shouldbe at least 21 years old before they are allowed to drive a car. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
It is widely believed that young people, especially those under 21, are more prone to causing accidents. Consequently, many argue that they should not be legally permitted to drive until they turn 21. In my opinion, completely prohibiting young adults from driving is not the solution; rather, they should be allowed to drive under specific conditions. This essay will discuss the potential hazards when late teenagers are permitted to drive and the possible benefits of allowing them to drive under certain restrictions.
8
band
You have recently started work in a new company. Write a letter to an English-speaking friend. In your letter, explain why you have changed your job describe your new job tell him/her your other news
I hope this letter finds you in good health and best of spirits. It’s been a long time since we caught up. I am writing to inform you that I have changed my job recently. I had to quit my senior accountant job from D.C Travelers last month due to problems in my commute to the office. As you know they moved their office from Brampton to Oakville thus, it was hard for me to travel for so long every day.
6
band
Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission outweigh the disadvantages?
In some countries like France young people are permitted to enter the majority of national museums free of charge, whereas in Lithuania and other countries money is required to enter a museum. Both scenarios come with their advantages and disadvantages.
7.5
band
Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changes because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?
Technology has taken the current world order by storm. One of its biggest impacts is on the way of communication among people. As we already know, life has become faster and so humans do not find much time for social needs so more rapid ways to interact have been invented. Though they have fewer negative implications too, I highly believe that they are blessings for us.
4.5
band
Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What, in your opinion, should be the main function of a university?
It is an argument between adults and parents that working skills and knowledge should be provided in the university campus whether others’ point of view do not neatly same to that. They are supporting the idea that the university must focus only on graduates’ sake, giving access to all information, regardless of whether it will be much more effective going to the special courses.

In many countries, the rate of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with this?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

You have recently started work in a new company. Write a letter to an English-speaking friend. In your letter, explain why you have changed your job describe your new job tell him/her your other news

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changes because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?