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Some people think that a car is the best way to travel in cities while others believe a bicycle is a better way. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. (14th Mar) (GT)

#people #car #travel #cities #bicycle #mar #gt
In the modern era, there is a controversy about
wether
Correct your spelling
whether
show examples
 a car is
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 means of
tansportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
 in cities or a bike is enough. I personally endorse the use of
bycicles
Correct your spelling
bicycles
instead
 of
cars
 because of reasons which I'm going to explain in the rest of
this
 essay.
To begin
 with, utilising
bycicles
Correct your spelling
bicycles
 to transport is beneficial in different ways.
Firstly
, It helps to erode the rate of traffic congestion which is a major
difficultiy
Correct your spelling
difficulty
 that most metropolises are confronting.
Such
as
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apply
show examples
Amesterdam
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Amsterdam
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 is the capital of the Netherlands and unlike other capitals, most people use public bikes mostly and there is no traffic most of the year.
Secondly
, physical activities are something that
cars
 vastly hinder us
having
Change preposition
from having
show examples
 which can be tackled by cycling
instead
 of driving.
Finally
,
besides
 the benefits for ourselves, cycling can save the environment from being destroyed by not consuming fossil fuels and any
kinds
Fix the agreement mistake
kind
show examples
 of energy except paddling. Despite
many
Correct article usage
the many
show examples
 advantages that bikes have, many individuals still believe they can not be an acceptable alternative to
cars
. Because of
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
show examples
 of fossil fuels, gasoline
vehincles
Correct your spelling
vehicles
 do not require any human activity and offer a more convenient journey to passengers.
Hence
 more fellas are enticed into purchasing them.
Additionally
, some fellows should take their families to work and school every day and
therefore
, neither they have enough time nor sufficient space to cycle. My father,
for instance
, takes me and my younger sister to school every day and we can not use bikes because we should be there early enough.
To conclude
, I think
upsides
Correct article usage
the upsides
show examples
 of cycling totally outweigh its potential drawbacks like being slow
accordingly
, It has persuaded me to support it more than
cars
.
Submitted by yasinisback8 on

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Language
Ensure to proofread your essay for minor spelling and grammar mistakes to improve clarity and professionalism.
Coherence & Cohesion
It can be helpful to explicitly state your main points in the introduction to guide the reader through your argument more clearly.
Language
Try to introduce more variety in sentence structures and vocabulary to make your essay more engaging and to demonstrate a wider range of language skills.
Task Achievement
Include a short summary of counterarguments in your conclusion to strengthen your position and show a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Content
You did a great job of presenting and supporting your argument with specific examples, such as the Amsterdam example, which makes your essay engaging and persuasive.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your organization of the essay with clear paragraphs for each main point helped in making your argument coherent and easy to follow.
Task Achievement
The conclusion effectively summarizes your position, reinforcing your argument convincingly to the reader.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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