A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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These days, it seems that social status and material possessions are prioritized when
people
assess
others
, overshadowing values like
honor
Change the spelling
honour
show examples
, kindness, and trust, which are often seen as outdated. In
this
essay, I will explore
this
phenomenon of superficial judgment and provide my perspective.
To begin
with, I agree that many individuals nowadays tend to judge
others
based on external factors
such
as fame and wealth, rather than considering their kindness or reliability. I attribute
this
trend to the prevalence of social media.
For instance
, some
people
gauge the worth of potential relationships by the number of followers on social media platforms.
Additionally
, individuals often cultivate online personas, even if they lack meaningful employment, in a bid to become 'influencers.'
This
reliance on superficial online interactions spills over into real-life interactions, where
people
assess
others
based on their social status and possessions.
However
, I believe that not all judgments are solely based on fame or wealth. Some well-known individuals have faced consequences for their actions,
such
as being rude or engaging in inappropriate
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
, which
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
been exposed on social media platforms.
This
suggests that many
people
value traits like kindness and reliability alongside fame. In conclusion,
while
there is a tendency to judge
others
superficially, there is
also
an
acknowledgment
Change the spelling
acknowledgement
show examples
of the importance of human values in contemporary society.
Submitted by mayu1022.p on

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General
To further enhance your essay, try incorporating a variety of complex sentence structures and a wider range of vocabulary. This can add depth and sophistication to your writing.
Support
Consider adding more concrete examples and details to support your arguments. While the examples provided were relevant, elaborating on them with more specificity can strengthen your essay.
Opinion
Make sure to explicitly state your opinion in the introduction and reiterate it in the conclusion for a stronger impact. This will help to ensure that your viewpoint is clear throughout the essay.
Topic Relevance
Effectively addressed the topic and provided a balanced view.
Structure
Organized the essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Example Use
Used examples to support points, enhancing the overall argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social status
  • Material possessions
  • Old-fashioned values
  • Honour
  • Kindness
  • Trust
  • Judged
  • Importance
  • Traditional
  • Reflection
  • Achievements
  • Hard work
  • Disregarded
  • Well-balanced
  • Meaningful
  • Cultural norms
  • Societal norms
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