Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing emvironmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Many individuals believe
so
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apply
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that
block
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to block
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pandemic
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pandemics
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and
skickness
Correct your spelling
sickness
slickness
,
Use synonyms
state
Correct article usage
the state
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ought to concentrate on dealing with environmental
pollution
Use synonyms
and accommodation issues. I fully agree with
this
Linking Words
statement and the reasons why will be outlined in
this
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essay. First of all,
it is clear that
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there
are
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is
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a lot of
pollution
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such
Linking Words
as air or water
pollution
Use synonyms
in urban areas.
Therefore
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, they bring
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many health
problems
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and cause damage to
environment
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the environment
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. In terms of air
pollution
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, residents should use public transportation and plant more trees in crowded areas. It will provide
amount
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the amount
an amount
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of oxygen gas to
atmosphere
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the atmosphere
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and reduce more carbon dioxide.
In addition
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,
government
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the government
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should spend money on improving the factories which deal with uncleaned water.
Moreover
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, making
poster
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posters
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or
advertisement
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advertisements
show examples
regarding environmental protection must be considered.
According to
Linking Words
these solutions,
people
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can reduce illness effectively. Another point
should
Correct pronoun usage
that should
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be tackled is housing
problems
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. It consists of
low quality
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low-quality
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
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facilities, remote
location
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locations
show examples
or lack of accommodation. They are
main
Correct article usage
the main
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factors
lead
Correct pronoun usage
that lead
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to
causing
Verb problem
apply
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illness for citizens.
Thus
Linking Words
,
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state
Add an article
the state
show examples
should solve these
problems
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immediately to prevent
pandemic
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the pandemic
show examples
from
people
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. The government can provide more land or
house
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houses
show examples
, discount
price
Correct article usage
the price
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of
flat
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flats
show examples
and
apartment
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apartments
show examples
. What is more, houses should be repaired and improved carefully. The
Use synonyms
state of the art
Add a hyphen
state-of-the-art
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apartment can
response
Replace the word
respond
show examples
requirement
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requirements
show examples
of citizens.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
will not sleep rough and have
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
positive impact on their health.
For example
Linking Words
, the
state
Use synonyms
of America built many houses for homeless or unemployed
people
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, it is evident that
reduction
Correct article usage
the reduction
show examples
of
pollution
Use synonyms
and housing
problems
Use synonyms
can
make
Verb problem
have
show examples
many benefits for humans.
Thus
Linking Words
, I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
idea.

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Structure
Make sure to organize your essay with clear paragraphs, each focusing on a separate main idea. This will enhance readability and structure.
Language Use
Use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to demonstrate language proficiency. While your essay shows a good range, aiming for greater lexical variety can help.
Supporting Examples
Provide specific examples to support your arguments. You mentioned general solutions and government actions, but including concrete examples or statistics could strengthen your arguments.
Grammar
Review your essay for minor grammatical errors to ensure clarity and accuracy in your expressions. Even small mistakes can detract from the overall professionalism of your essay.
Task Response
You have effectively addressed the prompt by fully agreeing with the statement and providing clear reasons and solutions.
Coherence
Your essay has a logical structure, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Cohesion
You've shown an ability to use cohesive devices effectively, linking ideas smoothly throughout the essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Environmental pollution
  • Public health
  • Respiratory diseases
  • Cardiovascular conditions
  • Infectious diseases
  • Mental health problems
  • Government intervention
  • Industrial emissions
  • Clean energy sources
  • Public housing policies
  • Safe and affordable housing
  • Environmental hazards
  • Green public spaces
  • Community well-being
  • Physical inactivity
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