In many countries crime rates among teenagers are higher than among other groups.What are the causes for this problem and what can be done to solve this?
In the modern era, crime rates
is
increasing and most Change the verb form
are
of
youth Change preposition
apply
Add a missing verb
are involed
involed
in it rather than other age groups. The main thing is that juveniles do not aware Correct your spelling
involved
from
Change preposition
of
this
wrong activities. There are various Correct determiner usage
these
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
of
enchaning it which I will explain in the upcoming paragraphs with solutions.
To start with, most Change preposition
for
of
teenagers are unaware Change preposition
apply
from
crime and they like to watch Change preposition
of
an action movies
. The main reason Correct the article-noun agreement
action movies
an action movie
of
Change preposition
for
this
problem that
they are Add a missing verb
is that
copy to
films which Wrong verb form
copying
are
utterly wrong for them because they do not understand Correct subject-verb agreement
is
about
reality. The second reason is that Change preposition
apply
parents
are busy in
their job Change preposition
with
along
with
they want to give them Change preposition
apply
luxury
life to their Replace the word
luxurious
childern
so they do not give proper Correct your spelling
children
time
to them and busy
Add a missing verb
are busy
to earn
money. Change the verb form
earning
For example
, the
survey done by Correct article usage
a
student's
university in 2015 that the Correct article usage
a student's
parents
was
occupied Change the verb form
were
in
work and Change preposition
with
due to
it
Correct pronoun usage
this
childern
had Correct your spelling
children
freedom
to Add an article
the freedom
doing
anything after Wrong verb form
do
the
school Correct article usage
apply
time
. Thus
, increasing the offense
is Change the spelling
offence
common
among youngsters than other groups.
Correct quantifier usage
more common
However
, if the problem then
here are some solution
to solve Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
to
it. First and foremost Change preposition
apply
that
school system could help Correct determiner usage
the
to
them because they Change preposition
apply
are spend
most of Change the verb form
spend
time
in school so teachers should give them knowledge about Correct pronoun usage
their time
wrong
things Correct article usage
the wrong
as well as
parents
should give more time
to their children with their work. To illustrate, parents
and teachers
Add the comma(s)
teachers,
are playing
Wrong verb form
play
important
role in Correct article usage
an important
teenagers
lives Change noun form
teenagers'
teenager's
bacause
they learn everything like good and bad things from them. Correct your spelling
because
Therefore
, they can teach them and being
Wrong verb form
be
a
better in their lives.
In conclusion, Change the article
apply
government
should ban Add an article
the government
on
movies which Change preposition
apply
are promoting to
crime because youngsters learn bad things from Wrong verb form
promote
it
. Correct pronoun usage
them
Also
, parents
should more focus on their children because they are earned
money for them but if their children Wrong verb form
earning
has
gone Change the verb form
have
to
Change preposition
down
wrong
path Change the article
the wrong
then
the money will be waste
Wrong verb form
wasted
for
Change preposition
apply
it
.Correct pronoun usage
apply
Submitted by harmanpreetkang20 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
Try to focus on providing clearer, more concrete examples to support your arguments. Specific, detailed examples help strengthen your position and make your argument more compelling.
Coherence & Cohesion
Consider using a wider range of vocabulary and more complex sentence structures to express your ideas. This can make your essay more engaging and demonstrate your language proficiency.
General
Remember to review your essay for any grammatical errors or typos. Minor inaccuracies can distract from your overall message.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, and use connective words to link your ideas together smoothly. This will improve the logical flow of your essay.
Task Achievement
You've addressed both parts of the prompt, discussing causes and providing solutions for the issue.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay structure includes an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps organize your ideas.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!