Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you or disagree and agree?
Some
people
argue that governments
must reduce air pollution
and housing problems
to prevent illness and disease. From my perspective, I agree totally with that
ideas and will give Correct determiner usage
those
the
reason to tackle the Correct article usage
a
problems
.
It is vital to understand that governments
give methods to protect Correct article usage
the environmentally
environmentally
. They should make laws to punish Replace the word
environment
people
who are littering and no awareness of environmental protection that the feature of environmentally
contribution Change the adverb
environmental
affect
Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
public’s
health. The quality of air and water is seriously polluted from emission factories and daily consumption activities. India is an example, India is Correct article usage
the public’s
in
the top of the countries for environmental Change preposition
at
pollution
. River
source in India is very terrible Correct article usage
The river
by
Change preposition
apply
people
always bathe or wash clothes in the river because they want to safe
money.
There are many reasons why many Replace the word
save
people
believe that governments
need to deal with limitation
of concentration on protecting Add an article
the limitation
pollution
and health Change preposition
against pollution
problems
. In many countries, the cause of poverty and overpopulation make
more illness and disease and Verb problem
causes
governments
should community propaganda and education; for example
, raise community awareness about environmental protection, encourage
action to protect the environment at the community level. In the modern era, Correct word choice
and encourage
governments
need to invest in effective water treatment technology to reduce pollution
and regenerate clean water sources. As a result
, the feature of
Change preposition
apply
effect
Correct your spelling
affects
of
health Change preposition
apply
problems
and environmental pollution
.
In conclusion, although
I concede that there is some merit in environmental pollution
and housing problems
are
being solved by each country, I firmly believe that Unnecessary verb
apply
governments
have many methods to deal with illness and disease.Submitted by [email protected] on
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Structure
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Paragraphing
Enhance your essay by dividing it into clear paragraphs, each with a single main idea, supported by examples or further explanation.
Linking Ideas
To provide clarity and coherence, link your ideas more explicitly, using a range of cohesive devices.
Sentence Variety
Work on varying your sentence structures to create more engaging and complex statements, making your argument more dynamic.
Task Response
Ensure you fully address the task by discussing both sides of the argument or by providing a more nuanced personal stance, explained through examples and reasoning.
Grammar and Vocabulary
Pay attention to refining your grammar and vocabulary, aiming for accuracy and precision in your language use.
Clear Stance
You have presented a clear stance on the topic, which is consistent throughout the essay.
Supporting Examples
You provided examples to support your ideas, like mentioning the environmental issues in India, which helps to strengthen your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.